Jay-Z has won.

Rusney Castillo, the projected-to-be-slightly-above-medicore free-swinging Cuban defector utility player represented by Jay-Z’s Roc Nation, will reportedly sign with the Red Sox for an OBSCENE amount of money despite not having played in a formal game in a year and a half. The bow tie man, little baby Ken Rosenthal, brings you this report:

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GAH! Reports had Castillo signing for anywhere between $30-$60 million. AND HE’S GETTING 72. Jay-Z FTMFW. All that for a guy with this scouting report.