Quick Post-Game Thoughts

bigballsCB2-0

These post-game notes, and the accompanying typos, brought to you by the Pumking I just drank.

Huge win. No other way to put it. Coming out of Indy with a W was a longshot under any circumstances, let alone coming back from down 14 in the second half for the second week in a row (hey, did you hear that’s a record?). This team is never out of it, they’re too well conditioned. From all the unconventional practice. In the dome, on Monday night, absolutely huge. This is why you don’t do those silly mock game-by-game breakdowns in the preseason. Anything can happen, like Andrew Luck throwing a pick on a third down play that should’ve been a run and then running out of gas on a game winning drive and leaving time for an EXSPROLSION.

 

Foles

Still a shaky game. He’s throwing behind receivers, seems to be checking down too frequently, looks like he’s playing tight. All that said, made better decisions tonight, looked more comfortable in the pocket, beat Andrew Luck on the road. Still had 331 yards and a win. The biggest problem is missing open receivers, or not throwing to their numbers. He said as much after the game. Also, I counted at least two times, maybe three, on the read option where he would’ve been better off keeping the ball. Sounds crazy, but the defense keyed so hard on McCoy that Foles could sneak 5-6 yards 3-4 times per game.

 

EXPSROLSION™

SWISS ARMY KNIFE. 26 yards rushing. 152 yards receiving. 25 punt return yards. He’s an x-factor right now. It’s not going to last all season. Fully expect Jon Gruden to be on the phone with his plump brother this week talking excitedly about how Chip uses Sproles, who’s 31, and still has speed, and, every now and then, BURSTS ALL OVER THE FIELD LIKE A HIDEOUSLY NASTY SEXUAL REFERENCE I DIDN’T MAKE HERE.

 

Zach Ertz

Is sex.

 

Video games

Foles on Sproles, post-game: “I used to play with him on the video game.” Me too, Nick. Me too!

Me, on March 13: Darren Sproles, who is one of the best Madden players of all-time.

Mike Tirico on McCoy: “Video game moves by McCoy.”

 

Riley Cooper

Just sent this to DeSean, because he misses him, baby:

 

Horse Collar

Bad call? Maybe. But horse collar tackle includes grabbing the jersey, ESPN:

via (@napier03)
via (@napier03)

If you’re gonna call the horse collar on grabbing the jersey, the play on McCoy is what you call it on.

 

Interception

Give me a break complaining about the non-penalty call on Boykin. That was a penalty in the preseason, not in the NFL. They should’ve thrown the flag on the Colts for throwing it there. AHHHHWHATAREYOUDOING?

 

Love Parkey

Made you nervous with that miss, but huge, massive balls to kick two game-winners against the team that just traded him. I was scared to death when they celebrated following the first kick. The edge is taken off at that point. Nope. Nailed it again. Kid’s got guts, unlike that giant sad sack of poo, Alex Henery.

 

Second half

58-10 in the first two games. Up-tempo practice FTW. Smoothies FTW. Navy sports science coach FTW. Brian Bryan Braman’s Chik-fil-A lunch FTW.

 

Just gonna leave this here

Screen Shot 2014-09-16 at 12.15.49 AM

[Think they held them to a field goal.]

 

SeeeeeeeeHUT

And the Eagles just jumped offsides. Dirty snap count from Luck. Real dirty. Jon Gruden likes it. KILL, KILL, KILL.

 

Gruden

I like him. He’s so excited about everything FOOTBALL, but knows his stuff. Spider-wide-banana-2-flex or some shit.

 

Red Zone

Gotta be better. Get the sense Chip didn’t want Foles throwing down there, didn’t trust him. Maybe because Riley Cooper has been brutally exposed, maybe because McCoy and Sproles. Whatever. But weird play calls in there.

 

Jason Peters

DAT BLOCK THO.

 

Malcolm Jenkins

Tip pass and eye-en-tea. He’s a stud. Inspires confidence.

 

Shirts

Voila_Capture 2014-07-28_09-34-12_AM

Get one.

 

Much more in the morning.

Thanks to our friends from ContentLeap.com for the GIF

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40 Responses

    1. huh? he and the secondary held andrew luck to a mere 172 yards. if you want to bitch about something, scold the d-line that gave up 169 yards on the ground.

  1. I still don’t understand how that “horse collar” call was a penalty. Cox got called for the same thing last week. The way I read the rule, it is only a penalty if you pull from in the collar.

  2. Shady.Foles.Sproules.

    ” This win is impressive as Hell”
    – Ray Didinger

    Gruden zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  3. Had a great game party at the mansion last night but I drank a few too many glasses of champagne. I woke up around 3:00 am laying on one of my solar panels with dry mouth and thought the beday was a water fountain.

  4. I told you that 1-1/2 glasses of Dom is your limit Jeff. Remember the last time you had 3 glasses? Jeeves and I found you humping the windmill on our neighbors estate.

  5. Your total self-absorbtion is so fucking offensive. “I tweeted if we stop them we can win”. You did?!! Go fuck yourself dickbag.

    And I said on March 12: Darren Sproles is great! Wait we all said that about 20 other times too. So what, you fucktard.

    And Gruden is insufferable, worst MNF announcer ever. Overstates the obvious and loves his own voice. So not surprised you like him.

    1. Kornheiser was terrible on MNF, also not a Dennis Miller fan.

      I actually don’t think Gruden is that bad, at least you can tell he cares what he’s talking about.

  6. Good call on the stop, Kyle. After I read that I thought you were gonna get crucified for being wrong this morning. But……you were right!!! I enjoyed your tweets last night during the game.

    Go Eagles!!!!!!!

  7. Don’t you eagles fans ever get tired of thinking your team is so great, yet never winning anything , ever? How about a few years ago when you got those 2 shut down quarters, everyone including the dick bag who runs this site knew that was the ticket to the Super Bowl. Now you have some college gimmick coach, the weakest division in the league, sproles and refs handing you games, and now this is the year!! Give me a break. 0-48

    1. Look at the little butthurt eagles hater.

      Please explain to me how Chip is a gimmick. I’d love to hear your educated interpretation you fucking jabroni.

  8. These “im drunk and fired up about the eagles” posts are just fantastic. A glimpse inside the mind of an uber douche. Make me want to bash my brains in.

    Can’t say I haven’t been there tho..

  9. Pumking is one of the most overrated beers though I’m not surprised you like it. Doesn’t even taste like beer…more like flavored liquor.

    Quarterbacks don’t beat opposing quarterbacks, they beat defenses.

    Also, it’s Spider 2 Y Banana….not wide.

  10. Fucking amazing I can’t type “h0rse collar” on this thread because of that chick Kyle was obsessed with . Wtf man lift the ban I was trying to make a point on the game

  11. I for one, thought this was Kyle best post in a long time. Good job breaking it down. And I think Foles will be fine. He hasn’t been last years Foles by any means, but nobody should be ptting those expectations on it. Franchise QB is such a loose word today, and I see Foles as a fine QB to run this offense. He’s quite literally the Anti-Romo

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