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via (@dhm)

It’s late and I’m still trying to wrap my head around this one. Please excuse any typos.

I’d like to begin with the highlights:

There, now that that’s out of the way, we can probably just call it a day. Of course, doing so would mean missing out on all the fun of a 27-0, historic ass-whooping of Eli Manning, his lame face, and the New York Giants on national TV.



Total team win. The Eagles can beat you in all three areas. Their offense has spurtability (talk to your doctor if you experience EXSPROLSIONS), their defense can put an insane amount of pressure on opposing quarterbacks, and their special teams play is nothing short of amazing. This, this is the Chip Kelly difference. It’s not about gimmicks and 12-year-old signal callers with comically large wristbands– it’s about a different fundamental approach to the game, trying to find an edge wherever you can. The focus on the special teams this offseason has paid off. They’ve blocked three punts (two for touchdowns), it feels like they have the potential for a massive return on every kick, and Cody Parkey, a last-minute addition, has been great. They also routinely appear to have more stamina than their opponent. I don’t know if football has a team stat comparable to WAR or UZR in baseball, but the Eagles are getting value from many different positions and facets of the game. What is the worth of great special teams play? I don’t know. But it’s something, and it’s producing results. The Eagles are gaining advantages in areas that many coaches take for granted. It’s the reason they’re 5-1.



Bob Costas actually asked Eli about the two Eagles videos – Bradley Cooper and the above, soothsaying highlights – during his pre-game interview. Manning shrugged them off, but perhaps if he had studied at least the cartoon, he may have been able to better prepare for the game.


LeSean McCoy

Can best be summed up by the cover of the Daily News:

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I guess everyone can stop eulogizing him now? There’s nothing wrong with McCoy. He was the victim of a bad line and inconsistent passing. Tonight, the line was able to open holes and go on the attack for once, and the result was 149 rushing yards. What’s more, when he’s able to run the ball consistently, the passing game is much, much better. But he has to stop dangling the ball away from his body like he’s taunting people. He’s always done it, but it’s been worse the last couple of games. He fumbled against the Rams and came dangerously close to doing so again tonight. But yeah, that’s nitpicking. Shady’s back. Tell a friend.



Loved the concept. Loved the look. Loved the result. They should do it more often. But the white stripe on the pants was too much. It actually took away from the all-black, everything look the Eagles were going for. I would’ve rather had all black pants, no stripes. In fact, two of the stripes were Midnight Green, but you could barely see them:

You know what would’ve looked great in contrast with matte black? Kelly Green.


I wonder if she digs his pecker?

via SB Nation

via SB Nation

I bet you Noah was really, really confused by this. Mom? Dad?



Things got so bad in the first half for Manning that I’m 99% sure he tried to get his guys to line up after the whistle sounded on the first quarter. An NBC camera cut to him and he was motioning for his team to hurry up. Must’ve been all that pressure, or the wedgie.

I don’t get him. Sometimes he can look deceptively skilled and unflappable, but most times he looks like a deer in headlights. ManningFace is a real thing. Eli’s body language when the going gets tough is akin to a guy who gets dragged into Sephora or a turkey when it learns it’s heading to the chopping block. All three put up a token fight, but they know the audible cries will only hurt their pride.


Eagles defensive line

Underrated. They’re a strength. Been saying it for weeks now.



Thank God:


Love Parkey




He’s moved on from his old love DeSean and found a new lover… who resides in the middle of the field. That’s the way to use Cooper. He’s actually serviceable catching balls thrown over the middle. He’s big and strong and can jump that go up there and get them. Maybe the black jerseys had him fired up. His best game of the season.



Early on, he had ALL DAY in the pocket, and he was able to look like the Foles of old. But man, he’s still making some baaaaaad decisions with the balls, throwing floaters toward the sideline that are just begging to be intercepted. It’s because he’s…

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… in the pocket with even the slightest bit of pressure. Getting Kelce and Mathis back will help, but he’s got to calm down.


Justin Pugh

Nice homecoming?


Mike Miss

Is getting killed for this Tweet, which he has since deleted:

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I gotta be honest here– I cracked a similar joke about salsa dancing when Cruz first went down, before realizing how bad it was. It wasn’t until after NBC came back from commercial that it became apparent Cruz’s knee basically fell apart. Still, it was a dumb thing to Tweet. But that wasn’t Mike’s explanation:

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Car or subway? Anyway, not gonna be a fun couple of days on Twitter for Mike:

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Blackout sack out

In less controversial and more hilarious lines– John Clark called it the “Blackout sack out” on Postgame Live.


Chip Kelly

“Pleased, but not satisfied”


More in the morning.