Should I Buy This Lot of Don Tollefson Sports Apparel?

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So this might complement my creepy wardrobe.

Some guy in North Philly, probably on behalf of enema-filled criminal Don Tollefson, is selling Tollie’s “NFL, Eagles, coats, jackets, etc.” on Craigslist and seeks an individual buyer for around $10k:

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All sizes in stock. Looking to unload them all to one buyer if possible this Sunday. Bring 10 grand + I have that many to unload. Shirts, lids, and vintage baseball cards too. Stay away if your going to low-ball.

Email me your name, address, and phone number for consideration. This is a Collection of a well-known celebrity I need to unload NOW. Hint….think tv newscaster and you should be able to figure it out. He is in jail and needs to raise money.

I will delete this ad when I pick the party I will meet this Sunday for this private one on one sale. So if you see it this ad, Im still looking for the right one to meet and You will be screened first.

– checks wallet… calls wife to make sure there are no plans for Sunday… asks what she thinks about her man, potentially carrying a goddamn frightening Santa, in oversized sports apparel worn by a criminal who slept with his mother until he was of legal drinking age… reaches out to seller to begin the negotiation – 

$7. I’ll pay $7.

No but seriously, if you show up in North Philadelphia on a Sunday afternoon carrying $10,000 to buy Tollie’s gross hand-me-downs, you might as well just save yourself the aggravation and off yourself. At least you’ll get to choose the method.

UPDATE: Just got the following text from my mom. Glad she’s reading:

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H/T to reader Casey

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24 Responses

  1. Honestly, you should be getting some of that $10k for all the publicity you’ve given the dirtbag. People wouldn’t care as much if it weren’t for you.

    Now that I’m done stroking your ego… I dunno, something about you being a douchebag or whatever.

  2. Well, we are waiting, Kyle…….

  3. the ad was posted a month ago, so it probably isn’t still available

    obviously tolle’s worn clothes are in high demand

  4. Tollefson and Shane Victorino??

    Today’s posts are off to another rip roaring start.

      1. …and the obligatory “Look how hip and ironic Connor Barwin is” post.

        1. And what an ‘every man’ Jason Kelce is.

          Don’t forget to order your “Kelly Drive” t-shirts by the way. It is almost car-washing season after all…

  5. I have the cleanest colon in the Bucks County Prison.

    Come and get it, boys…..

  6. ” off to a rip roaring shart”

    this is reminiscent of that creepy millionaire Uncle Eddie in the 80s.

  7. I have an idea for Tolly’s Flyers’ jersey:

    ENEMA
    16

    Too bad Clarkie’s number is retired.

  8. Tell your stupid Mom that the proper word to use is “you’re” not “your.” Idiots. No wonder there’s so many typos and uses of bad grammar on this shitbag site. Bad DNA and no brains.

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