Ruben Amaro’s Failed Acquisitions, Ranked



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Ruben Amaro isn’t just a calamity of poor PR, bad contracts and antiquated operational philosophy. There’s been plenty of flat out bad roster additions from ’09-’15:

43. Ben Francisco
Collateral damage from Cliff Lee who overstayed his welcome.

42. Steve Register

41. Brian Sanches

40. Shawn Camp

39. Hector Luna

38. John McDonald
Released by the Pirates & Indians after a 2-for-38 start, the Phillies grabbed the 38 year old off the scrap heap. He went 4-for-23, hit a homer and threw 1/3 of an inning in emergency relief before being traded for a C+ prospect. Maybe this one will work it’s way off the list.

37. John Mayberry Jr.
The Phillies inability to know when to fish or cut bait: Exhibit A.

36. Ezequiel Carrera
Exhibit B.

35. Brandon Moss
Exhibit C. [Editor’s note: They told him he couldn’t hit a fastball and then he went on to be an All-Star]

34. Brad Lincoln
The end of the Michael Young trade. Swing and a miss!

33. Brian Bocock

32. John Bowker

31. Steven Lerud
At least there’s Chooch.

30. Koyie Hill
At least there’s Chooch.

29. Paul Hoover
At least there’s Chooch.

28. Paul Bako
At least there’s Chooch.

27. Brian Schneider
Oh wait, here’s a… At least there’s Chooch.

26. Jack Taschner
What happens when you trade a B- prospect catcher for a mediocre backup catcher and then change your mind and decide you need a crappy reliever instead.

25. Pete Orr

24. Roger Bernadina

23. Casper Wells

22. Nate Robertson
Robertson couldn’t make it through the 8th inning of his 2nd appearance with the Phillies. Nate gave up 6 runs before his exit which led to his release just 17 days after he was signed.

21. Ronny Cedeno
0-for-9 with his 7th Major League club… good in the room?

20. Jeff Francoeur
“Frenchy” could crack the Top 10 before he’s done.

19. John Lannan

18. Chad Qualls

17. Juan Castro

16. Rodrigo Lopez

15. Reid Brignac
Bonus points for the endless mispronunciations of Reid’s last name. Brig-nack? Brin-ak? Brin-yak? Brig-nee-yak?

14. Jeff Manship

13. Tony Gwynn Jr.

12. Michael Martinez
He got a second year. And a third!

11. Laynce Nix

10. Jayson Nix
Like the other Nix, only shittier because we already knew how it would end.

9. Grady Sizemore

8. Shane Victorino Trade Haul
Josh Lindblom, Ethan Martin and Stefan Jarrin? Pretty sure one of those players are on the Flyers now.

7. Danys Baez
A preview of the Phillies inability to identify a good Cuban.

6. Michael Young
Young in name only. Tried to catch lightning in a bottle like the Jim Thome signing the season prior. Not so much.

5. Delmon Young
Younger than the previous Young but less productive and went on to help other teams for nothing. The Phillies released Young in August. He joined the Rays for a postseason run.

4. Hunter Pence Trade Haul
For Pence, the Phillies received Nate Schierholtz, Tommy Joseph and Seth Rosin. Schierholtz wasn’t invited back, Joseph can’t stay healthy and Rosin is too busy making movies with James Franco.

3. Ty Wigginton
$4 million for an aging vet whose power numbers dropped in Colorado. How’d this one miss?

2. Miguel Alfredo Gonzalez
Wouldn’t signing a Cuban prospect be the equivalent of a slam dunk? This one would make “Shaqtin’ A Fool.”

1. Cliff Lee Trade Haul
Maybe just maybe Philippe Aumont can anchor the back end of a below average rotation of a 65 win team in ’16. The other pieces — Tyson Gillies and J.C. Ramirez — are already gone. Plus, to bring back Lee, the Phillies lost a 1st round pick as compensation. Are we sure Ruben Amaro is best suited to negotiate a deal for Cole Hamels?


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7 Responses

  1. Surprised Obdubebelelelel Hererererarararara isn’t on here too…There are a few worse than Francisco and Moss probably shouldn’t be on here…but overall? Nice. Very nice.

    1. The Phillies were the only team to not give Moss an extended look… Compared to what they kept, it’s just puzzling.

      Last year of Francisco was one of the many disasters of 2011. A corner outfielder has to be better than .259/.332/.420.

      Odubel might end up on this list, too.

  2. May i suggest a field of 64? Then drag it out over 3 months, everybody loves that.

      1. Or maybe Josh Innes could ask them all their favorite sex positions… That’s never been done before.

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