The Eagles For Some Reason Traded Jon Dorenbos

Photo Credit: Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

I was sitting at dinner last night with ________ and ________, as we met with ________ to discuss our plan for Thursday at 10 a.m., when the news that the Eagles traded Jon Dorenbos broke. We all looked at each other and thought, What the hell?

Tomes have and will be written about the magic man and his infectious personality. Indeed, anecdotally, the few times I met Jon while doing the Great Sports Debate he could not have been more pleasant, even if his handshake grip is perhaps the strongest I have ever encountered. But in a stark change of tone and direction for me, I want to focus on the trade itself. Why?

Yes, Dorenbos was due to make about $1 million as a long snapper and the Eagles were ready to turn the page to Rick Lovato, who filled in for Dorenbos last year after they pried him away from his parent’s sandwich shop in New Jersey. They’ll save some money and, I guess, get their long snapper of the future. But to me this feels wholly unnecessary. Besides being a face of the team – consider how sad the Eagles have been over the last 8-9 years that their long snapper was one of their more marketable players – Dorenbos was really good at what he did, almost never muffing snap, never costing the Eagles a game, never providing the cringe-worthy last-second moment that will be replayed for all eternity. Trading him just feels like overkill. Like a move you didn’t need to make. Like why even take the risk? To save $800k in cap space, to get a seventh round pick? Is it really gonna be worth it when Lovato sails one over [backup quarterback]’s head? It’s even more odd when you consider that the Eagles extended Dorenbos last November.

This is nothing against Lovato, and it’s certainly not an emotional reaction over trading Dorenbos. I’m not that sentimental and honestly won’t lose any sleep over it. It just feels forced and kind of pointless. Like, why?

Anyway, I won’t dwell on it too much. There’s still a ton of work to be done. Soon.

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80 Responses

    1. Yes, can someone please provide that story. I am guessing it has something to do with Susie Celek as well.

      1. Boo hoo, stop crying over Howie Roseman trading a 37 year old long-snapper who overstayed his welcome with the Eagles.

        WIMPS

    1. That’s why NephJuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu Howie is the “best GM in the league”—G-@Y Uncle Jeffy said so…
      FUCK OFF JUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSS

  1. it’s simple Howie and lurie are cheap scumbags. no need to get rid of a locker room and fan fav to save a dollar

  2. Simple… Jus have zero loyalty. None… Look at what Jeffy did to Howie in favor of chip kelly. Jus somehow to this day buy German cars… How is that possible?

  3. The eagles organization always mess with the fans . lol lowlife front office that doesn’t know how to treat people

    1. Pete, you are classic loser. Go to work, you ugly pathetic pot smoking loser. Come to the Pittsburgh funny bone and we’ll talk about it.

      1. You just tried to act tough because he made fun of jeffrey lurie. You are the pathetic loser. You are not the eagles. You are a sad person that wraps their lives into a football team that has nothing to do with you except geographical location.

        1. uh no, you apparently didn’t get the “pittsburg pete/Artie” reference, smart guy. Good try though. Hasn’t community college started yet?

          1. Youre so tough man like super tough…the level of toughness is extraordinary…guess i missed the artie/ pete reference class in community college, my stars the toughness…you must be a big boy!

    2. Pittsburgh pete is actually a male with a low IQ from the beautiful neighborhood of Mayfair, he contributes nothing to society and usually has below average hygiene. You can usually find him stuffing his face at Reale’s during 10 cent wing night(s) and shopping at Walmart.

  4. That little weasel howie was just jealous of all the pussy dorenbos got.

  5. 17 million over the cap. Overpaying for Alshon Jeffrey and Torey Smith because they’re trying to pad Wentz’s stats as opposed to building an actual team. Kelce and Kendricks should go next.

    That being said. It’s a long snapper. Who gives a shit? Dime a dozen player…oh wait, he can make his thumb disappear and does some coin tricks. Let’s have a mass weep session for him.

    1. It will happen on it’s own, just give it time. You can only cram so many ads and surveys in, and eventually Kyle’s parents will decide it’s silly to continue financially propping up a website for their silver-spoon baby who’s now in his thirties.

  6. What is “Tomes”??? When he shook YOUR hand he was thinking, what a limp ass dish rag!

  7. However I do somewhat agree here. Who trades a long snapper? In the long run, who really cares? But this is just a weird move so that little boy Howie can say he made a move. Pointless and hopefully cost them a game or two so that little weasel FINALLY gets fired.

    By the way, is 97.5 capable of doing a show without doing a stupid, and mostly moronic, twitter poll? They get worse by the way.

    1. I think the idea is that the $850k savings this year can be rolled into next year’s cap, effectively yielding $1.7M of space in next year’s cap. Minus whatever they have to pay Demi Lovato.

    2. I’m with you….it’s just a long snapper so who cares. But in typical Eagles fashion, why wait until now to make this move this close to the start of the regular season? Eagles will miss the playoffs by one game which they’ll lose because of a bad snap on a game winning field goal attempt.

      1. Who gives a shit when they made the move? They think Lovato can play from what they saw last year. Whether or not he fucks up doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that they traded Dorenbos today instead of 4 weeks ago or whatever. It’s long snapping, not rocket science.

  8. The magic man gave us 11 years on the long snap . Got a ton of pussy and a big fake tit ex wife . Not enough for a big pension, but enough for us to know that he was, despite his negligible ancestry, his defects of personality and his inconstant sobriety and hygiene, a true Philadelphia Eagle. Jon, I say this seriously. If I was laying there dead on some dirty Philly street corner, I’d want it to be you standing over me, snapping the ball. Because, brother, when you were good, you were the best we had.

  9. “But I met him once and he was nice to me!!”…Kyle, troll-hack that he is, is always complaining that Philadelphians cant “handle” superstars, that we end up pushing them out, how we always are misguided in how we deal with them. Now he needs a Midol at the news that we traded a long snapper for a draft pick (actually a pretty good deal). Acting like we just traded Chase Utley in his prime and shit. “It just feels forced and kind of pointless. Like, why?” Uhhh I dunno, because we got a damn draft pick for him and he’s…….a long snapper? God you suck. Praying that this “site news” doesn’t involve you becoming part of something bigger.

  10. BREAKING !
    – The Eagles have acquired CB Joe Haden from the Cleveland Browns through a 3 team trade!

    The Eagles give up their 2018 2nd round pick.. more details to come.

    1. Eagles already gave up their 2018 2nd round draft pick to the Browns to move up for Wentz in 2016.

      1. Na they got that pick back from them. This deal is done yo. Welcome to Philly Joe Haden! Our D is so sick now!

  11. First of all, he was a freaking long snapper. Cry me a river.

    Second, didn’t you expose / ruin his magic trick? Didn’t feel too bad for him then, I guess.

  12. They traded him because he is a special teams player out of 53 that cannot do anything else. if you can recapture his wasted roster spot then do it! For years the team was willing to waste a position on something that a useful player could have done. Now that they identified a useful player, get rid of dead magic weight.

  13. Correction
    The Eagles, for some reason, traded Jon Dorenbas.

    Commas are your friend.

  14. Not sure if you’ll read this….but thank you mr. Dorenbos. I’m sure you wont remember me but I met you a couple of years ago at an autograph signing at the KOP mall. I told you how I was going through a divorce at the time and how your long snapping helped me get through some tough times. You told to me to “keep my head up” and to “take care”. I’ll never forget those words, thank you again mr. Dorenbos.

    ~ @NT

  15. can we write off color and racist comments??? can we use Rita Hewes real name without having to type it in like that <?

    1. It’s pretty funny that he’s removing those posts. $40 a year and no advertisements with legit writers and good reads. I can’t wait.

  16. Damn!!!! Jim Adair breaking another massive story!!!! That dude is legit baller. Welcome to Philly Joe Haden.

  17. Big ups to Giancarlo Stanton and Rys Hopkins… my best customers.

  18. I thought I was the fooking king of hyping up something that will completely disappoint everyone. Kyle can take my crown, man.

  19. Can’t wait for Thursday at 10AM!!!! So excited for the new Crossing Broad. Jim, Leslie, Dan K all coming home to contribute to the #1 source for philly sports.

    1. Kyle is a loser and this will fail like everything else in his life up to including his marriage

      THATS RIGHT KYLE I KNOW SHE LEFT YOU BAHAHA

    2. That’s not nice, bro. Kyle may be a sewer dweller with a gutter blog but he’s a person and doesn’t deserve that, bro. Alright, bro?

  20. Wanna see my magic trick? I can make a long snapper disappear and pull a 7th round pick out of my ass. Give uncle Jeffey more money, mofos.

  21. Pat Eagan will be taking over the mid day show starting this week. Huge pay increase for Pat, very much deserved.

  22. Josh Innes was seen in the Houston floods floating down the highway and 14 people were holding onto him for safety

  23. No podcast today so I listened to Sims and Lefkoe (drink) and Adam is so much better on this podcast. He seems so miserable and uninterested on your podcast Kyle compared to the BR version. Not looking good buddy.

  24. I think Kyle’s announcement tomorrow is going to be huge. He’s got the best posts, better than anyone else. He’s got the best brain and uses the best words. I give Kyle my full support for this Philly sports blog. Huge and great things are coming Kyle’s way.

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