Hold up. We can do the Vince Velasquez thing in a minute. I know you want to, and I get it. After three weeks of the hype train chugging full steam ahead, Velasquez was brutal today, and his disappointing performance certainly deserves a closer look.

But this bullpen, man. Wow.

The 2021 Mummers Parade may have been canceled, but you were treated to a parade of “not good enough” for six innings from the Phillies’ bullpen today in South Philadelphia.

I’m going to shoot you straight here. The team’s bullpen was rife with question marks (that’s being polite) heading into last winter and that such a glaring weakness was not addressed in a meaningful way by Matt Klentak’s front office was nothing short of baffling.

It’s early, small sample size, all of the qualifiers–I know. But Phillies manager Joe Girardi was asked about his bullpen after the game, and he didn’t seem like he wanted to go into too much detail.

“Well, I think we’ll probably have discussions after this call,” he said. “And we’ll discuss it tomorrow and continue to try to get the most out of these guys and improve what we’ve done so far.”

I’m thinking, as it turns out, that crossing your fingers in the hope that Seranthony Dominguez’s elbow wouldn’t explode–an elbow most were expecting to explode following his decision to skip Tommy John surgery last season–probably wasn’t the way to go about addressing the issue. Gabe Kapler didn’t have a ton to work with out there last season, and the menu Girardi has to choose from may be even less appetizing.

After Velasquez exited the game, Girardi turned it over to Cole Irvin, who promptly allowed five hits and four earned runs. He recorded just three outs.

Irvin, who now has a career 6.54 ERA over 42.2 IP, lacks the stuff to consistently miss bats.  As such, he can ill afford to miss spots, and he did that way too often today.

Of course, Reggie McClain was responsible for two of Irvin’s runs after surrendering a three-run homer to Brian Anderson on his first pitch of the afternoon:

Nick Pivetta, who I suppose remains in play to fill a rotation spot should that eventually be needed, wasted little time joining the fun in the sixth. Nope. Can’t throw the ol’ 12-6 in this spot:

He would go on to allow yet another run in the seventh before pitching a clean eighth and recording the first out in the ninth.

In all, it was a disheartening weekend for a bullpen that many considered to be the Phillies’ Achilles heel entering the season. After a rough debut from Ramon Rosso in a big spot on Friday night, four Phillies’ relievers combined to surrender seven runs on Sunday afternoon. Thank God for the clean Hector Neris appearance.

Now, here are some other observations from the Phillies’ sloppy 11-6 loss to the Marlins.

Velasquez Can’t Match The Hype

Okay, let’s do the Velasquez thing now.

I’m going to preface this whole breakdown by stating that two things can be true. I’m going to do this because I know the masses are all too happy to fire off the “haha-told ya so” takes right now.

Velasquez did look good in summer camp. He was impressive against the Yankees in last Monday’s exhibition tune-up.

The changeup was effective, the cutter cut. The fastball had late life.

He won the job on merit. Then, today happened, and you have to wonder if he’s going to lose the job on merit.

In his 100th career major league league start, Velasquez looked much like the same pitcher he has been for his first 99 often frustrating starts. There was some good (four strikeouts in three innings) but also far too much inefficiency and way too many mistakes to really notice the good. That tends to happen when a guy allows four earned runs on 60 pitches in only three innings of work.

Girardi noted extra rest as a potential factor.

“He seemed to really lack some command today. I’m not sure why, I don’t know if it’s excited—his first start,” Girardi said. “One of my biggest concerns is always a guy’s first start of the year and the first start after the all-star break when they’ve had extra rest, usually.”

After an impressive 17-pitch first inning, Velasquez was staked to a 4-0 lead. At that point, the Phillies had an 87.0% win probability, according to ESPN Stats and Info.

The lead lasted for all of one out into the second inning as Velasquez imploded, yielding a pair of homers to Jesus Aguilar and Miguel Rojas. Turns out 92 mph and fat doesn’t play, not even to a guy who entered the day with 20 homers in 1,734 career at-bats:

The 26-pitch second inning was a nightmare scene reminiscent of Velasquez’s Aug. 23 start last season in which he was staked to a 7-0 cushion that didn’t last beyond the third inning of an eventual 19-11 loss. Incidentally, the Phillies had a 97.3% chance of winning that game after building that big lead, according to ESPN.

Vince Velasquez. Comfortable lead. Live betting. Take the opponent. Remember that one next time.

Sure, it’s just one start. But Spencer Howard stated today in Lehigh Valley and with a plethora of other arms stretched out, there’s little wiggle room for Velasquez here. He simply failed to take advantage of a fleeting opportunity this afternoon.

“For Vince, it’s really important that he bounces back, he goes back to work, he bounces back, gets his stuff right, and has a good start the next start,” Girardi said.

And yes, there will be a next start. Velasquez will pitch on Friday against the Blue Jays (the game has been moved to Citizens Bank Park). The guess here is that this might be his last chance to prove he belongs in the rotation.

Hmm, I don’t Know, Joe.

The Marlins tied the game, 5-5, in the fourth inning on a Miguel Rojas triple. That’s when, with one out, Girardi elected to bring the infield in against Magneuris Sierra. Of course, Sierra promptly hit a flare (that had an expected hit probability of .040) over the outstretched glove of Scott Kingery to give the Marlins a 6-5 lead.

I don’t get Girardi’s decision. It’s the fourth inning of a tie game. The ball is flying out. The offense is, at the time, getting good swings. Also, you have Cole Irvin on the mound, a guy who doesn’t exactly miss bats (only 6.7 career K/9).

I like a gambling man, but this was a head-scratcher to me.

Then again, given what Girardi has to summon from beyond the bullpen gates, maybe he should consider going to his arm as he walks out to the mound to give one of the hardcore fans stationed out beyond the gates of Ashburn Alley a shot.

A Bad Situation

For as much of a shit show as the pitching was in this game, the Phillies’ situational hitting helped sink them this afternoon.

They left the bases loaded in the fifth, sixth, and eighth innings. Twice, the Phillies failed to get runners home with a runner on third and less than two outs. Jean Segura (fifth) and J.T. Realmuto (sixth) failed to muster anything beyond two infield pop-ups. Segura, who had a tough weekend, also ended the eighth with a weak fly out to left.

In total, the Phillies stranded 14 runners and were just 2 for 13 with runners in scoring position.

Better situational hitting would’ve put the Phillies back in the game. Little things like this get lost when the starting pitcher turns in a brick turd and the bullpen is a mess, but situational hitting, too, was a problem today.

After the game, I asked Girardi about it. Here’s his response:

I mean, it’s way too early for that, Bob. I thought we had some pretty good at-bats today. We had some chances in the fourth, the sixth, the eighth, the ninth, and we weren’t able to come through. I didn’t see guys swinging and missing, I saw some pop ups that they got. And that’s probably being a little bit more patient and staying off the high pitch that looks great to everyone, no matter what type of hitter you are. It always looks great. I think our approach has been pretty disciplined, but that’s the time we’ve went up a little bit, chased up a little bit, and it’s hard to be successful when you do that.

Haseley Makes His Case

I thought Roman Quinn spent most of July ahead of Adam Haseley in the Phillies’ plans. Girardi seemingly agreed as Quinn started the first two games of the series against Miami, but Haseley made his case on Sunday with an impressive four-hit performance. It will be interesting to see who’s in center tomorrow night when old friend J.A. Happ takes the mound for the Yankees.