This one is on me.

After the fourth inning, I walked out of the press box to go check out the Phandemic Krew with the Phillies holding a 1-0 lead.

Good stuff out there, by the way, everyone was rocking masks, they were loud and having a good time – they even let me climb up one of the ladders and blow the air horn.

Good times.

But by the time I returned to the press box, the Braves had hung a five spot in the fifth, knocking an inefficient Vince Velasquez out of the game and exploiting a *very* exploitable bullpen. Today’s culprits were Deolis Guerra and Adam Morgan, who teamed up to bury a squad that was also unable to muster much offensively.

The game one kill shot came via this Adam Duvall bases-clearing double:

Valasquez kept the Braves off the board for four innings but was quickly lifted following a leadoff single in the fifth. Somewhat of a weird start for him. He was…what’s the word here. He was whatever.

“Today was not really a solid day as far as commanding all the pitches,” Velasquez said after the game. “It was just pretty much just a two-pitch mix – fastball, change – I threw a lot more pitches than I should’ve. I got ahead of a lot of guys and I ended up not putting them away.”

Unfortunately for Velasquez, “I threw a lot more pitches than I should’ve” is something he could say about the majority of his 101 career starts.

He allowed only a single run, but he was also out of the game after recording just 12 outs. He needed 27 pitches to navigate the second inning and, as he often does, worked at a glacial pace. Afterward, he was asked about his pace. Velasquez expressed belief that his more deliberate tempo has benefits.

“Today was kind of big for me as far as the pickoff. The pickoff has been very effective, but it’s a matter of changing speeds, holding the ball,” he said. “That strike-him-out-throw-him-out was very huge to give Knappy (Andrew Knapp) enough time to throw him out. Pickoffs, holding guys, that’s what I’m starting to understand and collaborate with my whole routine going into the game.”

At one point during the radio broadcast, Larry Andersen quipped that Velasquez may be unaware he isn’t being paid by the hour, calling his pace “borderline ridiculous.”

Despite failing to inspire a ton of excitement, Velasquez mostly did his job. The bullpen, however, did not.

Continuing a troubling trend that has seen the Phillies’ first reliever out of the doors struggle this season, Deolis Guerra retired his first batter faced before serving up for a two-run homer to Ronald Acuna.

Turns out, middle-in, belt-high slop doesn’t play in the big leagues:

https://twitter.com/handlit33/status/1292534329545981953?s=20

In nine games this season, the Phils’ first relievers into the game have combined to allow 16 earned runs while recording just 17 outs.

To borrow Andersen’s phrase, that’s “borderline ridiculous.”

The offense did not help matters, particularly the first two-thirds of it. The Phillies first six hitters combined to produce an impotent 1-for-16 at the dish, though those guys did join forces to draw four walks (eye roll).

Rhys Hoskins, who was 0-for-2, worked two of those walks, but his average is now down to .111 this season.

Update #1: Hoskins collected a pair of hits and squared up some balls in game two.

In fact, since the 2019 All-Star break, Hoskins is hitting just .174 (49-for-282).

While Hoskins has managed to maintain a respectable on-base percentage thanks to his 12 walks in 38 plate appearances, you have to wonder just how longer manager Joe Girardi can continue to stick with him in the two-hole.

Not a lot to feel good about after this one, but in an effort to keep things positive, maybe the Phillies are just saving their runs for the second game of Sunday’s doubleheader.

Update #2: Nope.

I’m sure that Spencer Howard, who is slated to make his major-league debut in game two, would appreciate it.