No Risto for the season opener. He’s out with a BODY injury:

Ristolainen – OUT (body)

This makes me laugh hard. Not as hard as the Flyers should tank for Connor Bedard, but what are we even doing here? It’s bad enough that hockey folks only ever give us “upper body” or “lower body,” but now we can’t even get that. Torts is only going to tell us it’s a “body” injury, as opposed to what? A brain injury? Gastroenteritis? Irritable Bowel Syndrome?

I give Torts maybe three games before he gets into a fight with one of the beats. This shit is gonna wear him out fast.

Look at this:


No Risto, no Coots, no Cam Atkinson, no Ryan Ellis, no Bobby Brink. We haven’t even played the first game yet.

No offense to these guys, because there are some hard workers in the group, players who would be good second or third liners on better teams, but this is the worst opening night roster the Flyers have put on the ice since 2006. It is absolute dreck. Of course, now that I say that, they’ll go out and win 3-0 tonight. Buzz the Old Takes Exposed guy and get him ready.

Speaking of getting ready, Bedard should start looking for an apartment in Old City. #TankHardForBedard