The Washington Commanders are eliminated from playoff contention, but they did debut a new mascot on Sunday:
Now I know what youâre thinking. Youâre thinking something along the lines of âwhat in Godâs name is this abomination?â However, letâs not forget that everybody poo-pooâd Gritty when he was revealed several years ago, only for Gritty to take off like the Jeff Bezos space rocket en route to uber-popularity. Nobody really âgotâ Gritty at first, then he clicked immediately and it was all downhill from there.
Major Tuddy could be on the same path. Heâs a pig, yes, but weâve got a branding two-fer here. A double entendre of marketing. The swine design is a reference to the famous Washington offensive lines of the 80s and 90s. Then the âmajorâ goes hand-in-hand with the military theme of the new âCommandersâ nickname. So you kind of hit on two different fronts here, one honoring the history of the franchise and the other speaking to the recent rebrand. Itâs clever!
The only thing thatâs kind of a miss is âTuddy,â because the Commanders canât score. They have 33 touchdowns this year, which is 25th in the NFL. It would have been more appropriate to call him âMajor Interceptionâ or âMajor three and outâ because these guys stink worse than a busted pipe at FedExField, and donât give me the Heinicke over Wentz nonsense, because they are both garbage. The QB of the future is currently not on this roster, unless youâre in the extreme minority of Sam Howell fans.
I like Major Tuddy. Look at this jiggly motherfucker:
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