Meantime:

Totally random. I thought this might be a high-speed Pennsylvania Turnpike job, but apparently it happened in California.

The team writeup:

The Pittsburgh Penguins announced today that the shipment carrying the Jaromir Jagr bobbleheads for tonight’s game against the San Jose Sharks has been stolen after its arrival in California. As a result, the bobbleheads are not in Pittsburgh and will not be distributed at tonight’s game, but will be distributed at a later date.

The Penguins learned that they were victims of cargo theft after failing to receive the shipment as scheduled. The team worked with the manufacturer and transportation companies to alert the appropriate state and federal authorities who are currently working to locate the cargo. This is an open investigation and no further comment will be made in order to not hamper with the recovery of the goods. 

“We were shocked to be a victim of cargo theft, and we are working closely with local and federal authorities on the investigation” said Penguins President of Business Operations Kevin Acklin. “While this unfortunate incident adds to the legend of Jaromir Jagr, who will be in attendance as our guest at tonight’s game, we look forward to resolving this theft and delivering the prized Jagr bobbleheads to their rightful homes, with our fans,” said Acklin.

All fans in attendance will receive a voucher that includes a one-time scannable barcode that will be required to pick up the bobblehead at a later date. Location and dates for pickup will be announced when the items are safely located or new bobbleheads are produced and available for distribution. Only fans in attendance are eligible to receive the voucher.

Cargo theft? Piracy? Somewhere somebody is sitting on palettes of Jagr bobbleheads and figuring out how to fence them, and then launder the money through Walter White’s car wash.

This had to be an accident, not the theft part, but the identifying of the product. Maybe they just swiped a bunch of boxes hoping for something of value, but then they took them back to the hideout and opened them up and found hundreds of dolls of a Czech hockey player. But you can’t just give them back, can you? Do you take the boxes to a drop site and put in an anonymous call to the police? “Sorry, we were lookin for Rolexes, we’ll give back the bobbleheads.” Would the authorities be willing to look the other way? If this happened in Philadelphia, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Larry Krasner would choose not to file charges.

I think we know who’s responsible for this heist: