Eagles news from exactly where you’d expect it – Gillian Tan at Bloomberg. Jeffrey Lurie is looking to sell off some of the Eagles:

Jeff Lurie is exploring a sale of a minority stake in the National Football League’s Philadelphia Eagles, according to a person with knowledge of the matter.

Lurie is working with BDT & MSD Partners to solicit interest from potential suitors for a stake in the team, which may be valued at more than $7.5 billion in any transaction, said the person, who asked not to be identified discussing confidential information. The $7.5 billion figure represents a multiple of roughly 11 times revenue, and would represent a record price tag for an NFL team.

I don’t think I’ve ever heard a reporter refer to Jeffrey Lurie as “Jeff Lurie.” We’ll monitor to see how long that stays up before Gillian gets a nice, but passive-aggressive email from Eagles PR to change it to his formal identifier.

Anyway the article says that the future buyer won’t have a path to a controlling stake. This is still Julian’s team, whenever his old man feels like stepping aside.

Here are a couple of people I’d like to see purchase a stake in the Eagles:

Bradley Cooper

This is a no brainer. This guy played himself in Silver Lining’s Playbook. He’ll also probably get an Angelo’s in the Linc, which would easily rocket to the top for best stadium food ever.


Rob McElhenney

The guy is already a sports team owner. I don’t know how liquid he is at the moment, but once Wrexham gets to the Premier League he’ll probably be able to scrape together enough cash for a stake in the Eagles. Only problem is Wrexham is about two years out from that. Can Lurie hold on for a couple more trips around the sun to allow a guy who grew up in South Philly to add to his sports empire?

Northeast Philly

Could everyone in the Northeast pool their money together and buy a stake in the Eagles? It would be the greatest social experiment ever. If you really wanted to see how the team would be run by a bunch of WIP callers, you should be rooting for this. Imagine if they owned a stake last year. AJ Brown? Gone. Nick Sirianni? Cya. Kenny Pickett would be QB1 and Jeremiah Trotter Jr. would’ve been drafted in the first round. They probably would’ve traded into the top-10 for Cooper DeJawn and Darius Slay would’ve been dealt to Siberia. Saquon would be getting the ball 40 times a game this season. Hope Jason Kelce doesn’t mind moving his Eagles autism charity event from the OD to Keenan’s. The team name would’ve been changed to Crusaders and the colors to red and Columbia Blue while scheduling Lincoln High on Thanksgiving against the Birds’ first string every year. Screw Bradley Cooper, this is my new #1 contender.

The Saudis

Give me the blood money.

Stay with me here – when we’re looking at the Saudis lets use Kinker’s “Two Things Can Be True” theory. Are the Saudis bad people? Surely. Do they have a history of turning teams into consistent championship contenders? Absolutely. Ask a Yinzer if they’d give those two Super Bowls back because Ben Roethlisberger was under center. Eagles fans don’t care about anything other than hanging more banners and 80% of them couldn’t point to Saudi Arabia on a map. Plus the players hate the team travel. Emirates luxury anyone?

The NFL is one day going to let private equity in the door. Regular American billionaires can’t keep up with the inflated franchise prices. Josh Harris, who made all his bones in private equity, just bought the Commies. It’s coming. Foreign investment won’t be too far behind. Losers will bitch about things like “morality” and “injustices” until Jerry Jones lets the PIF in the door and the Cowboys start winning titles. Do you want to live in an America where the Cowboys are champions? Didn’t think so. Those guys are going to look so cool when FOX pans to a bunch of guys in a suite with Kelly Green headdresses on.

The only drawback is that the Birds would have to play a game out in Riyadh in the next couple of years. Drinking alcohol is illegal. Imagine trying to tell that to these freaks:

Imagine the Eagles reporters’ heads on a swivel at all times. Invest in a remote start, Jeff McLane! We don’t want you end up cooked like pork roll out in the NovaCare lot.

Mike Trout

I’m pretty sure we’ve gotten an email or two that this is actually plausible, but never had enough evidence to report it on the blog. But the worst kept secret in Philly is that Mike Trout apparently has dreams of being apart of the ownership group one day.