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The Neshaminy Mall Will Be Demolished in December
By Matt Schultz
Published:
This is a sad day, but one we all must’ve known was coming sooner or later: Jo Ciavaglia and JD Mullane of the Bucks County Courier Times reported on Monday that the Neshaminy Mall will be closing soon, with demolition of much of the mall scheduled to begin in December.
Bucks County’s first shopping mecca, the Neshaminy Mall, is set close before the end of the year, two years after it was purchased with plans for large-scale redevelopment that could be unveiled as early as this month.
Bensalem Mayor Joseph DiGirolamo confirmed Sept. 14 that demolition for most of the mall is set to start in December, though the AMC-24 Movie Theater, and popular anchor stores, Boscov’s and Barnes and Noble, will remain.
It was not immediately known on Monday if those three businesses will remain open during the demolition and redevelopment of the 91-acre property which includes more than 1 million square feet of retail space
What a real bummer. I remember there being a bunch of chatter about redevelopment when the mall was sold a few years ago, which I assumed meant keeping the structure intact and just making alterations here and there. I guess that was a naïve thing to think. Or maybe I just don’t know enough about real estate stuff, or what developers mean when they say “repurpose.” I am learning now, though. It means they’re going to pretty much tear down the whole mall and just leave the AMC Theater, Barnes & Noble, and Boscov’s.
What a shame. The Neshaminy Mall is a special place — at least to me and a bunch of other Lower Bucks folks who grew up going there all the time — and the mall’s unique physical space is a huge reason why. The white/purple/teal/tan floor tiles laid out in squiggly, wave-like designs. The skylights with the big metal bars over them. The fat, swollen-looking white trash cans:



And, of course, the fountain with the Native American guy crouching by it. This was a good fountain. Last time I was at the Neshaminy Mall, they had taken all the water out of the fountain and replaced it with a kind of blue felt material. Picture a poker table, that soft green felt, but instead of green it was bright blue. Like they wanted it to look like there was water in the fountain from far away, but without any fountain-water smell, or fountain-water burbling sounds. It was very depressing.
And the Native American guy was still there, crouching by the blue felt fountain, doing his thing. But now he’s leaving too, I guess. I am bumming myself out while typing this. I wonder what they’ll do with the Native American statue guy:

Plus, the history-themed dioramas that decorated the walls of the fountain area. Most of them were already removed a while ago, and the mall put these huge black tarps over the glass where they used to be:

And it sounds like the remaining ones will be gone in the next couple of weeks, too:
Within the next three weeks Bensalem Township plans to remove the remaining three dioramas depicting scenes from early American colonial history that have sat outside the former Macy’s for decades, DiGirolamo said.
The township has already removed four other dioramas and two have been fully restored including their animatronic functions, DiGirolamo said. The two are located at the Mercer Museum and the Bensalem Municipal building.
At least those are going to a museum. That’s pretty nice. Let’s send the fountain and the Native American statue to a museum, too. And the dated, colorful tiles. And the swollen trash cans. This stuff is important. I don’t know why, but it is. I’m going to think on this and try to figure it out in time for the official Neshaminy Mall obituary in December.
Matt Schultz is a comedy and sports writer from Philadelphia. He’s written extensively for ClickHole, The Onion, and Conan O’Brien’s Team Coco. His work has been featured in Vulture, Deadspin, The A.V. Club, Paste Magazine, and other publications. Much of his sports journalism can be found on college basketball websites that don’t exist anymore (PhilaHoops Heads rise up…) email: M.Schultz@sportradar.com