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Farcical Commanders Lovefest Continues with Washington Being Awarded the 2027 NFL Draft
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The 2027 NFL Draft will be held in Warshington, according to every insider on the planet. We’re just awaiting official word from the league:
The Draft was held in New York every year from 1965 to 2014, then they got wise and took the show back on the road, doing a couple of years in Chicago before bringing it to Philly, Arlington, and Nashville. Next year they’ll be in Yinzerville and then it goes to The Swamp down in D.C., where all of the corrupt career politicians and slimeball Capitals fans live. Gross!
That being said, it’s not too early to start planning a Philadelphia Eagles fan takeover. As you know, Tailgate Ted got up on a chair like he was Julius Caesar and proclaimed that Commie fans had conquered our Hard Rock Cafe, which nobody goes to. The only people who go to the Hard Rock are tourists that are visiting the Convention Center. Ted then went to the NFC Championship Game and watched his boys lose 55 to 23, then Birds fans took over his cancer fundraiser and added several thousand dollars via spite-based philanthropy, which nobody does better than Philadelphia.
There is a Hard Rock in D.C. Looks like it’s on E Street, not the crappy band, but the road, only a few blocks up from the Mall. We can see about reserving a room and then putting together an organized kelly green march that will make January 6th look like amateur hour.
Here’s the other thing, are you getting sick of this Washington Commanders lovefest? I am. They’re getting all of this publicity and praise for simply not being terrible, for finding a franchise quarterback after like 30 years of stinking up the NFC East. Oh boy, they had a good season for the first time since the first George Bush was in office! Josh Harris hired some people who aren’t idiots! They’re replacing their crappy husk of a stadium with something modern!
Don’t get me wrong, these are all good things, and finally being challenged by the Commies in the division is refreshing, but you and I could have done this. You and I could have stumbled into Jayden Daniels with the 2nd overall pick and fired everyone from the previous regime. We could have brought in the 49ers assistant GM and hired a retread coach. It’s less about how amazing Josh Harris is and more about how completely inept Dan Snyder was. But these people haven’t seen winning football in ages, which means the bar was placed lower than it’s ever been. The bar was basically laying on the ground. All you had to do to clear the bar is have half a brain and a pulse. It’s kind of like that Chris Rock skit where he talks about people taking credit for “shit they’re supposed to do.”
Like look at this, why don’t we just build the Josh Harris statue right now? –
One final thought – have you noticed that Commies fans are really bad at social media? They got their rear ends kicked in the NFCCG and then watched the Eagles smoke the Chiefs in the Super Bowl. What did they come back with? They talked about fleecing the Birds in the Jahan Dotson trade. Talk about reaching. They’ve been so irrelevant for so long that they don’t know how to banter. It’s sad!
Oh man, the Commies finally don’t suck:
Kevin has been writing about Philadelphia sports since 2009. He spent seven years in the CBS 3 sports department and started with the Union during the team's 2010 inaugural season. He went to the academic powerhouses of Boyertown High School and West Virginia University. email - k.kinkead@sportradar.com