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NBC Sports Philadelphia is So Sick of Watching the Flyers That They’re Switching to the Sixers, Mid-Broadcast
By Matt Schultz
Published:
The Flyers have lost three straight. They only have three wins on the season, and currently sit at a dismal 3-7-4 for a measly 10 points. Their season started on September 30th, by the way. The Flyers have three wins in a month’s time. Woof.
In short, they’re an awful team that makes for a truly bad watch. So bad, in fact, that it seems like even NBC Sports Philadelphia is dying to flip the channel:
This was a broadcasting error, of course, but I wish it wasn’t. I like the idea of NBC Sports Philly straight-up broadcasting something else if a team is playing shitty enough. Doesn’t even have to be sports. The next time the Flyers fall behind while playing their typical, boring brand of hockey (which will probably be during their next game, on Sunday against Utah), I’d like for NBC Sports Philadelphia to take a stand and abruptly cut to Crystal Lake on Peacock.
It’s a fine show. It’s alright. The first two episodes were very fun, then it kind of falls off. I think they bit off more than they can chew. There are too many characters I don’t care about. But that’s alright. In fact, it’s even better that the show isn’t that great. That’s what the Flyers get. That’s their punishment. The Flyers play so bad that NBC Sports Philadelphia starts airing episode 5 of Crystal Lake.
They don’t even start at the beginning. They don’t play a “previously on Crystal Lake” intro. They just plop you in at the 16-minute mark. Linda Cardellini is acting all weird and has blood on her face and she’s walking around in the woods. That’s all people need to know. You’ll catch on. She’s Jason Voorhees’ mom. That’s the whole show. She’s going all nuts. It’s fine. The pilot was genuinely good. Was interesting to see them remake Jason as a kid. He looks all fucked up. His head looks wild. Size of a heavy early-2000s Dell monitor. You really feel for him. Can’t help but wish he wore some sort of hat or a hoodie instead of going bare-head all the time. Wig. A nice one that glues on:
Can you believe he’s going to take Manhattan one day https://t.co/ZX1eZ6djFX
— vic (@vicloveshorror) October 24, 2026
In any event, seeing him at camp doing his thing would be better than watching the Flyers, considering how they’ve been looking. Do it, NBC Sports Philadelphia. Flyers fans deserve something nice. Give them a mediocre show instead:
Matt Schultz is a comedy and sports writer from Philadelphia. He’s written extensively for ClickHole, The Onion, and Conan O’Brien’s Team Coco. His work has been featured in Vulture, Deadspin, The A.V. Club, Paste Magazine, and other publications. Much of his sports journalism can be found on college basketball websites that don’t exist anymore (PhilaHoops Heads rise up…) email: M.Schultz@sportradar.com