Phillies

For Some Unknown Reason, Jonathan Papelbon Wore Carlos Ruiz’s Jersey to Close Out the Spring

By Kyle Scott

Published: Mar 27th, 2014 · 4:32 PM EDT

---

AND WHAT A SPRING IT WAS! The Phillies finished 9-16 in Grapefruit League play and were shut out in their final two games… in which they mustered up a combined… carry the 3… three hits. Three hits in two games. I really love to count!*

*Really sad admission here, but I just now – like, today, at age 30 – realized that “Count” Dracula on Sesame Street is just a really bad pun on Count Dracula. Like the whole numbers thing is just an ironic twist on the name. Sometimes we have our aha(hahaha) moments. This is one – 1! – of mine. UPDATE: A commenter points out his name is Count von Count, not Count Dracula. I don’t even know what we’re talking about anymore. Apparently I didn’t have a childhood. I just woke up one – 1! – day and was 18. 18! Just forget I ever brought it up.

via Reddit, (@BriMcL17)