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UPDATE: The Phillies Have Signed Bobby Abreu, Because Awwwwww Fuck It
By Kyle Scott
Published:
The Phillies, still looking for a left-handed bat to come off the bench, are “sniffing around” on Bobby Abreu, multiple baseball sources tell CSNPhilly.com.
General manager Ruben Amaro Jr. did not deny gathering intelligence on the veteran outfielder, who turns 40 in March.
“We’re looking at all the left-handed bats still out there and he’s one of them,” Amaro said.
100% sure the Phillies have given up on the season. Amaro is Peter Gibbons in Office Space right now. He doesn’t care. He’s trying to get fired. He’s one week away from bringing a fish into the office and slicing it open on his desk. It’s not that I’m lazy, I just don’t care.
That, of course, could be a slogan for Abreu, too.
UPDATE: And before I could finish posting this, the Phillies signed Abreu:
Just had the following conversation on the phone with my Dad, who loved Abreu when he was here:
Me: Congratulations! The Phillies just signed Bobby Abreu.
My Dad: As a player?
Kyle Scott is the founder and editor of CrossingBroad.com. He has written for CBS Philly and Philly Voice, and been a panelist or contributor on NBC Sports Philly, FOX 29 and SNY TV, as well as a recurring guest on 97.5 The Fanatic, 94 WIP, 106.7 The Fan and other stations. He has more than 10 years experience running digital media properties and in online advertising and marketing.