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It’s a Tough Morning for Any Idiot Who Swore Off the Sixers
By Kyle Pagan
Published:
I woke up this Thursday morning feeling sick to my stomach. Couldn’t pinpoint what it was. Why was I feeling a little off? Had my coffee and still couldn’t put my finger on it. It was similar to that feeling when you’re post-30 and you had a couple beers and wake up with that tiny little headache/fogginess. That feeling like you’re not firing on all cylinders. The one where your Apple Watch tells you your sleep score was a 41 and maybe you’re a little more impatient waiting for your breakfast sandwich this morning. Something was off. Was it the cold chill of fall? You’ve always been a summer guy. Did AJ Brown tweet something overnight? Did you see on Instagram a classmate who’s more successful than you? It had to be something. Then I remembered what I tweeted 24 hours ago. I’m not being tricked by the Sixers again. What a terribly ill-timed very bad no good tweet after VJ Edgecombe led the Sixers to glory:
And now I can’t blame anyone whose bought into them:
All it took was Hip-Hop coming out of retirement, another Phillies choke job, and the most points scored by a rookie in their debut since the Eisenhower administration for people to Joel “Do a 180” Embiid on this team. I mean every time we talked about the Sixers on the site this summer we’d just get roasted in the comments. “Who cares!” “Call me when Embiid plays 50 games!” Blah. Blah. Blah. Now there’s a line outside Mitchell & Ness of people lining up for black #77 jerseys.
And look I’ll be honest with ya, I didn’t watch the game last night. Can’t say I don’t practice what I preach. Lot of media guys in this city could take a note. But still the highlights were awesome! Edgecombe is the truth and don’t forget I was always an Edgecombe guy. They called the Gov and I crazy:
…still doesn’t mean I’m buying in…yet. Tyrese Maxey might be a legitimate #1 guy you can run the offense around, but the carcass of Joel Embiid is not hobbling his way to 50 games this season. The guy could barely move last night. Maybe he was told by doctors to not jump as much as possible (or any at all) to relieve as much swelling on his knee, but I don’t know how he’s going to defend any big man better than Neemias Queta. We’ve still got to see whatever the hell Paul George is too. Hell Kash Patel could nab a 76er next. It’s a long season. But in a weak East this team could make some noise and I’ll be there with one eye on them watching in the shadows. Everyone knows the NBA season doesn’t start until after the All-Star Break anyway. Catch me in March with my foam finger, waving a crusty ass “Run With Us” towel over my head, and wearing a bootleg Phil E. Moose/Hip Hop 2012 t-shirt. And listen, don’t let me pour water on your Sixers boner. If you’re completely bought in remain that way! Go all in. Live and die with this team for 82 games. That’s the way sports are supposed to be consumed. It’s much more fun than how I woke up today. The only person having a worse morning than me is ESP:
Kyle writes blog posts and does Man on the Street-style videos all around Philadelphia. He graduated from Temple University (a basketball school) in 2015. contact: k.pagan@sportradar.com