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Punxsutawney Phil Predicts Six More Weeks of Winter, but the Good News is that His Track Record is Shit
Published:
Punxsutawney Phil predicts more of this frozen hellscape:
The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration compared rodents in January of 2025 to see which one is the most accurate. Phil was way down at the bottom with a 35% rating. That was a 20-year analysis “using the February and March temperature averages for the U.S. each year from 2006 to 2025.”
#1 on the list was Staten Island Chuck, which is embarrassing. Pennsylvania shouldn’t be losing to anybody, let alone some overgrown rat from an outer borough. Something called “Lander Lil,” allegedly a prairie dog STATUE out of Wyoming, is second with a 75% rating and then a bunch of copycats round out the top 15. Phil is knocking on the basement door along with Michigan’s “Woody the Woodchuck” and then a tortoise named “Mojave Max.”
Groundhog Day is a goofy tradition, right? A lighthearted and fun thing, but I don’t see anybody laughing. Not around here, where an inch of ice has been sitting on top of a foot of snow for more than a week now. To make matters worse, it hit 32 degrees on Monday, so just enough for a tease, but no meaningful melt, like we were all slapped right in the face and mocked.
Kevin has been writing about Philadelphia sports since 2009. He spent seven years in the CBS 3 sports department and started with the Union during the team's 2010 inaugural season. He went to the academic powerhouses of Boyertown High School and West Virginia University. email - k.kinkead@sportradar.com