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Putting Together a Turning Point USA Super Bowl Halftime Lineup that Doesn’t Suck

By Kevin Kinkead

Published: Oct 21st, 2025 · 11:22 AM EDT

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If you’re living under a rock and/or blissfully unaware, there’s been a lot of hemming and hawing about Bad Bunny’s selection as the Super Bowl halftime performer. Conservatives seem to be bothered that he doesn’t sing in English and that he’s a satanic liberal who hates America (paraphrasing). He’s a Puerto Rican who wears women’s clothing or something like that. At least that seems to be the gist.

Spawning from the distaste is a alternate Super Bowl halftime show, which is being organized by Turning Point USA, the late Charlie Kirk’s foundation. They’re calling it the “All American Halftime Show,” which will take place opposite Bad Bunny’s performance. There’s a webpage where you can sign up for updates and select some of the music genres you would like to hear represented on the bill. Those options, top to bottom, are “anything in English,” Americana, Classic Rock, County, Hip Hop, Pop, and Worship. No death metal or EDM categories, unfortunately.

Whenever this topic comes up, conservatives always throw out the same boring names, like Kid Rock and George Strait. You get Ted Nugent and a bunch of country artists, as if there’s nothing else on the musical “right.” But if we’re doing a conservative and/or Christian lineup, those two things not NECESSARILY being the same, there’s more to choose from, a lineup of these groups, perhaps:

Stryper

Christian hair metal from Los Angeles. One of the classic glam groups from that era. Their 1986 album To Hell with the Devil went platinum and featured their biggest hit, a song called “Honestly” that got a ton of play on MTV back in the day:

Living Sacrifice

O.G. Christian metal from Arkansas. Lots of groove that dips into the metalcore world. They’re a regular at Furnace Fest and they’ve been on-and-off active for about 35 years now:

Relient K

These guys had a run in the early 2000s in that pop punk/alternative scene that featured bands like MxPx. They played Warped Tour a couple of times and had a decent following in the suburbs:

Project 86

Another good Christian rock band that formed in the mid-90s. They never stopped, putting out five albums since 2012 and touring consistently. They used to play that Christian music festival at the ski resort called “Purple Door” –

Flyleaf

Not sure Flyleaf is a Christian band as much as they have Christian members, but whatever the case, they held that label for a time. They used to tour with bands like Three Days Grace and Stone Sour and played the Family Values tour a couple of times:

P.O.D.

Could probably put P.O.D. in the same category as Flyleaf. Less of a Christian band and more of a band comprised of Christians. But their biggest years no doubt had a lot of Christian themes and lyrics and they had some smash hits back then:

Ted Nugent

Okay okay, we have to have the Nuge in the lineup. Likely headlining. But nothing from the mid-80s or later. Only songs from the first four albums:

honorable mention: Demon Hunter, August Burns Red, Underoath, Switchfoot, Disciple, Anberlin

not honorable mention: DC Talk, Jars of Clay, anything Aaron Lewis did outside of Staind

disclaimer: This is not a political post. It’s a music post. I’m gonna have a three-screen setup, one showing Bad Bunny, one showing the TPUSA show, and then the third showing The Puppy Bowl.

disclaimer 2: Is this a real post, or a shitpost? Good question. I’m not totally sure.

editor’s note: I took the Newsboys out of this story, had no idea Michael Tait was accused of sexual assault. What the hell man! Put Michael Tait in the bagster (allegedly). Here’s an August story on that from People Magazine.