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Union Win 5-0 in an Empty Stadium Because Trinidadian Home Crowd was in Church After “Two Days of Absolute Fornication”
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The Union opened their 2026 season with a 5-0 stomping of Defence Force F.C. inside of an empty stadium.
The play-by-play guy says the home fans were at church:
“Everyone is expected to travel to church and get their blessings after two days of absolute fornication.”
Well there’s a baked-in excuse if you ever needed one. Why were Knicks fans allowed to take over Xfinity Mobile Arena? It’s because Sixers fans were at the Basilica receiving their ashes after two days of fornication. That’s why tickets were $12 on the secondary market. And Embiid was injured anyway.
The context is that they celebrate Carnival in Trinidad and Tobago on the Monday and Tuesday before Ash Wednesday. It’s that big festival they do in the South American and Caribbean countries that more or less serves as a final indulgence before the 40-day Lenten period. We call it Mardi Gras in New Orleans, but same thing basically. They have a parade or street party or whatever, and you over-indulge on food and drink and related debaucheries.
Truthfully speaking, the absent home crowd didn’t miss much. The Union absolutely stomped their boys. Bradley Carnell threw a hodge podge lineup out there and they ran the Trinidadians off the pitch entirely. The U are back!
DOOP
Kevin has been writing about Philadelphia sports since 2009. He spent seven years in the CBS 3 sports department and started with the Union during the team's 2010 inaugural season. He went to the academic powerhouses of Boyertown High School and West Virginia University. email - k.kinkead@sportradar.com