Bernie Parent just keeps living the life. Last night, he was seated with WAYNE GRETZKY at the Flyers-Maple Leafs game. Pictures via reader Mike, who is in the Flyers jersey, who will almost certainly tell me what the two legends talked about???
Bernie Parent penned his second column for Philly.com today and, of course, he speaks writes the language of love:
It is crucial to keep your relationship healthy and alive. Take note of two things: allow your partner to be their own individual, and realize you are on a two-way highway. The secret is that we all have faults and defects. It is easy to dwell on the faults, but try to program your mind to focus on the good things. I am also a firm believer that friendship is a foundation and a staple in all relationships. You are going to come across issues and bumps in the road. If you have established a friendship and you both have recognized that the greatest substance in a healthy relationship is communication, things tend to work themselves out. If you have good communication, it goes a long way. If you don’t, you will eventually start moving in different directions.
Have fun, laugh, and life will reward you with beautiful experiences.
You don’t always get what you want, but you always get what you attract. What you are attracting is what you are thinking.
With love this Valentine’s Day,
Bernie Parent
Happy Valentine’s Day, lovers.
Sports Betting Updates
Wing Bowl, 2012
Bernie Parent is now writing a column for Philly.com as part of the enigmatic website’s misguided effort to increase page views and save money by bringing on mostly non-writers to, well, write, an undertaking that likely won’t lead to a measurable increase in visits to the site.
Well, maybe Bernie will lead to a measurable increase… in visits to the site.
In what has to be one of the strangest and most surreal (read: awesome) columns you will ever read, Bernie, citing his “balls to go out there at 66 years old” for the Winter Classic Alumni Game in 2011, encourages you, the reader, to find your hidden wolf this Valentine’s Day.
Ladies and gentleman, Mr. Parent: [the fun parts are highlighted]
For some, Valentine’s Day is a time to show your appreciation for loved ones. For others, it’s a day of impending doom, a pointless “holiday,” and a yearly reminder of the reasons you are single.
Being that I am a seasoned ladies man and “Philadelphia’s most interesting man,” I have the same message for both types of people: Find your wolf.
If you are single, allow yourself to do some inner-searching and find the person that you want to be, so you are ready and willing to share that with someone else when the time comes. Remember, happy feelings will attract happy circumstances.
For those of you that are in a relationship, let your partner be their own wolf. Don’t restrict your partner. Let them fulfill who they are as an individual; it does not mean they don’t love you. If you let them go, let them do, they will explore and be their own person. That is what makes the bond between the two of you stronger.
Don’t leash them, don’t cage them, just have fun. And do it together.
“I am a free spirit; either admire me from the ground or fly with me, but don’t ever try to cage me.” –Unknown.
I’ll open up the floor to the readers. Email me your questions.
Stay horny, my friends.
–The Most Interesting Man in Philadelphia
Bernie Parent
I am speechless. Horny, but speechless.
Never change, Bernie.
Philly.com, as part of its never-ending quest to churn a profit by doing things that will NEVER CHURN A PROFIT, will add “New Voices” in an effort to pump up its content offering without, you know, hiring actual journalists: [Philly.com]
Ari Rabin-Havt, the nation’s most exciting new progressive commentator; Philadelphia’s own John Featherman with his unique and penetrating conservative viewpoints; Mark Segal, one of the region’s and nation’s most compelling gay leaders and the publisher of Philadelphia Gay News will add topical commentary in a new column entitled, Mark, uncensored; Kenny Gamble, a Philadelphia cultural and business giant; Table Matters blogger Jason Wilson; leading interior designer Carrie Leskowitz; Dr. Jill McDevitt, a nationally recognized sexologist; technology pundit Eric Smith, co-founder of Geekadelphia; activist Chris Goldstein who writes about the issues surrounding marijuana; Maria Papadakis whose videos will cover the local social scene and celebrities; and Bernie Parent, an inspiring member of the NHL Hall of Fame who writes about self-empowerment and motivation.
I will look forward to Dr. Jill McDevitt’s sex talks, because…
… yeah.
And I’ll also look forward to articles by Bernie Parent, who continues to have the best life in the history of life:
"Bernie is one of the most legendary players in Flyers history who personally inspires me by the strong bond that he shares with so many in the community through his mentoring and leadership." said Lexie Norcross, Director of Interstate General Media, parent company of Philly.com. “We are thrilled Bernie will be part of Philly.com and know that he will instantly entertain and motivate readers.”
For real, Parent is awesome. His existence basically consists of banquets, paid speaking gigs, fishing and cigar sponsorships (he writes a weekly fishing report and has his own cigar!), taking photos with topless chicks at Wing Bowl, and now, getting paid to write things on Philly.com.
I’m not so sure any of this makes business sense for Philly.com, because, chances are, 70% of the “New Voices” won’t be able to string coherent sentences together… but, Bernie will undoubtedly entertain.
Philly.com’s VP of Digital Advertising Steve Alessi explained the new initiative thusly:
“The New Voices” is a platform that will soon debut on Philly.com and will feature notable national and local leaders addressing a wide and diverse range of topics. “Our goal, at Philly.com is to reach across the full breadth of our region’s ideas, its people and their lives,” said Steve Alessi, Vice President, Digital Advertising and General Manager of Philly.com. “Relevance and reach can be overused terms, but “The New Voices” reflects our desire to transform and deepen the traditional relationship between a media company and its community.”
I have no idea what that means.
Bernie: Look at him– he's like a big bear. You just want to hug him.
Bryz: Teddy bear.
Bernie Parent and Ilya Bryzgalov were with our fine sponsors, BC Sports, in the Manoa Shopping Center yesterday, and, of course, NBC 10’s resident stalker John Clark (I say that admiringly) was there to speak with the legend and our wacky-turned-best-player-in-the-NHL Russian goalie.
For the first time in a while, we get to see Bryz not in his here to destroy you trance, which is nice. He even jokes about the pressure on him and taking three shots of vodka before every game. It’s hard to tell if he was talking about Bernie taking shots (because that would be 100% believable) or himself (which I’m 99.9% would be a joke, because Bryz says doesn’t drink). A (large) part of me wants to envision Bryz sitting in a room, perhaps nude, smoking cigarettes and sipping the nectar of his homeland before every contest in front of silly Americans. But I doubt that’s the case, unfortunately.
Delightful wacky goalie exchange video after the jump.
Bryz's Thermos, which he might need to get over the flu
There are few things which delight Flyers beat writers more than the mysterious concept of goalie drama.
This morning, when Sergei Bobrovsky and some 5’10ish dude with a white helmet took to the ice sans $51 million goaltender, the Twitters went aflutter. Who is this masked man? Where is Bryz? Is he hurt? Did Peter Laviolette murder him and jettison him off into the, you guessed it, universe?
No, not exactly.
Bryz has the flu, according to Paul Holmgrem. And the 5’10 goalie is a 26-year-old from Drexel Hill named Justin “Moose” Musciano, who, apparently, skates regularly at the SkateZone. Pretty cool opportunity, but not rare. Another local goalie sometimes fills-in during practice, too.
…
As (@FakeWIPCaller) on Twitter points out, the best underlying subplot from Wing Bowl is – not surprisingly – the emergence of Bernie Parent as a certifiable creeper. I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary when I saw him hanging backstage with Kobayashi and Tony Luke Jr., but, one person I was talking to in Kobi’s locker room, in between Bernie's two visits, told me the following: Hey, you just missed Bernie. He walked in and said, “Alright, let’s see some pussy!”
Then there was the reader who saw him sign a tit.
Then we got a picture of the tit.
And now, Maureen O’Connor, of Gawker, relays this bit of tid. I’m not sure if it’s hyperbole or not, but I’d imagine it’s not far from the truth: [Gawker.com]
My Wingette disguise worked perhaps too well. One of the dignitaries in our group was Bernie Parent, the 66-year-old former NHL goalkeeper who won the Stanley Cup with the Flyers in 1974 and '75. A white-haired man with a tan face and squashed nose, Bernie walked up to me before our entrance, chuckled, and wordlessly began to rub me like a shiny trinket.
"You see this ring?" he said, waving a Flyer's ring before my face and applying friction to my torso. "I got it for winning the Stanley Cup." He rubbed me from my ears to my elbows. "What, not a hockey fan?"
He pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of his boat.
Never change, Bernie. Never. Change.
…
Finally, somehow I missed this one in the midst of all the Winter Classic news: The New York Rangers are being sponsored by DKNY: [Sports Business Journal]
The NHL Rangers have signed a sponsorship deal with DKNY in which the clothing brand will appear on the team's practice jerseys for the remainder of the '11-12 season (Rangers). The branding will have "quite some visibility" as the Rangers are featured in HBO's "24/7" series leading up to the Bridgestone NHL Winter Classic on Jan. 2. DKNY in April '10 inked a long-term sponsorship deal with the Yankees, "which brought its city skyline logo to a billboard in Yankee Stadium"
It all makes sense, too. Justin Bieber’s friend Henrik Lundqvist was spotted at New York Fashion Week.
H/T to NYRangersBlog.com
Fuckin’ Bernie, man.
On Friday, I showed you the interesting pre-Wing Bowl exchange between the Zen-like Kobayashi and Philly notables Tony Luke Jr. and Bernie Parent. It was like worlds colliding– the old goalie and a Philly sandwich king, out of their element as they embraced the Japanese eater. It wouldn't last long, though. About an hour after that exchange, while Kobayashi was well on his way to downing a record 337 wings, reader Daniel informed us that Bernie returned to his element and signed a tit in a luxury suite.
Well, we think our tipster found the breast in question. A very NSFW picture is after the jump.
Never change, Bernie. Never change.
via the Flyers:
The Flyers have announced that two-time Stanley Cup champion and Hall of Fame goaltender Bernie Parent will play in the Flyers-Rangers Outdoor Alumni Game on Dec. 31 at Citizens Bank Park.
In addition, Flyers Hall of Fame goaltender Ron Hextall has been added to the team’s official roster as an ambassador.
Wow! Beers for all!
Full roster here.
