Posts for pnc

Shittsburgh: Sewer Pipe Under PNC Park Breaks

Kyle Scott - May 18, 2012

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A Heinz Ketchup bottle dumping into a shithole in the outfield at PNC Park as an allegory for Pittsburgh makes Plato's Cave look like the nonsensical scribblings of a mad man

A sewer pipe under PNC Park clogged today and crews had to dig up the outfield to get in there and clean the shit out (quite literally).

WPXI reports the clog was fixed at around 2 p.m.

Team officials said the field will be repaired by the time the Pirates return home on Monday. They also noted that the outfield in Pittsburgh has been covered by shit for nearly two decades now, so the incident shouldn’t have any effect on the game.

via Deadspin

Two Yinzers Ripped a PNC Park Security Guard’s Finger Off This Weekend

Kyle Scott - May 17, 2012

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I should tell you that this post is being written live from a Panera Bread, where a man, who I don’t know, decided that roughly 18 open tables didn’t suit his needs and he would plug his computer in and sit at my table, across from me. 

So I bring you this story while sharing a desk with a man I’ve never met. If my words suddenly come to halt, either John Quinones showed up… or I’m dead.

Yinzers ripped a PNC Park security guard’s finger off this weekend.

Really.

A Pittsburgh Post-Gazette story tells us about Rachel George, 21, and her father, Christopher, 50, who attacked a security guard and police officer while Rachel was being escorted out of the stadium after she was caught smoking in her seat. Things got out of hand rather quickly: 

As Pirates security supervisor Joseph Risher was escorting her out of the right field gate, Ms. George's unidentified boyfriend assaulted him and ran off. Ms. George jumped on the guard's back and started to pull him backward, the complaint says.

Her father joined in the attack, pushing him up against a fence.

"While defending himself, Mr. Risher got his left hand caught on the fence, and when he was pulled by both (defendants) his left middle finger was ripped off at the second knuckle and was hanging by a piece of skin," Detective Rende wrote in the complaint.

 

A police officer also injured his shoulder while placing Rachel in a stadium holding cell (yep, other cities have them too). 

Mr. Risher’s finger was later reattached during surgery. 

Classic Shittsburgh right there, folks. I mean, from their look to the act. Smoke-stained, greasy dirty blonde hair? Check. Rustic handlebar mustache accompanied by hollow, lonely eyes? Yep. Getting kicked out of a stadium for puffing on a cigg then assaulting a security guard and ripping off his fucking finger? Oh you bet. A three rivers trifecta right there.

Sadly, this won’t live on in sports infamy, but if it happened in Philly it surely would.

H/T to readers Adam, Steve, Dave, and the guy sitting acr