Blech. Like a huffy, post game Andy Reid, let's just say I don't want to talk about last week. In fact, it was the worst uniform upset of the season.
So, that leads us to Week 17, when there's a good chance the games won't matter. And true to form, that's what we get this year. The starters are resting, their playoff seeding can't improve, and tickets are in the $80 range... for a home game against the Cowboys. Really. I guess the Cowboys could be playing for Jason Garrett's continued employment, but detailed analysis of anything but the Cowboys' uniforms or of-field sucktitude is beyond the scope of Crossing Broad.
In general, fan reaction to the 1960 throwbacks worn in week 1 was immsensely positive. Even for fans like me who didn't particularly like the specific uniform, it was nice to see Kelly Green make an appearance (its first since 1995). So, with an opportunity to make some aspect of Week 17 interesting by wearing the throwbacks (and in cynical terms, provide an advertising platform for them), the Eagles chose not to rock the boat, and they'll wear their normal Midnight Green over White combination. Boring.
Now, a quick word about NFL uniform scheduling: NFL teams must annouce the uniform plan for the entire season sometime in the summer, before the first preseason game. (This is unrelated to when teams change their uniforms/logos/branding. Those decisions are made years in advance. I'm talking of the nitty-gritty "which jersey with which pants" schedule and deciding the up-to-two regular season games where they'll wear wear the third jersey, whether it's a throwback or a normal alternate that particular season. This is why we didn't see the Eagles black jersey this year. They only get one "third" jersey in a given year.) Uniform-enthusiast-friendly teams like the Texans publicly annouce the entire schedule in the summer, while other teams (like the Eagles) announce the uniform combinations the week of the game, and there are plenty of teams which announce nothing, making my job quite difficult if they have numerous uniform combinations (Redskins, Saints, Rams, etc. — though only the Redskins were on the Eagles' schedule this year). So, all that to say, the uniform decisions are made early in the season, so the Eagles couldn't see that Week 17 wasn't looking particularly compelling, then decide to switch from the normal uniforms to the throwbacks because of that.
But, for some armchair uniform scheduling (which is almost as awesome lame as uniform-based fantasy sports), my pundit-ish comments are as follows:
- Throwbacks for week 1 and week 17 would have been nice bookends for the season, which conveniently started and ended at home
- It gives fans something to look forward to for a potentially dreary week 17 match-up
- Week 17 was a Cowboys game, so it's easily considered a "special" game. (in retrospect, we can see that we fans really don't give a crap about the Cowboys rivalry if the game doesn't matter, and the Cowboys have a season which is known for nothing other than serial underperformance).
- Merchandise. (though maybe they should've worn them against the Cowboys in the away game which was pre-Christmas.)
So, punditry aside, this is the same uniform match-up we saw in Week 14.
In summary from last time: the Cowboys almost always wear White, and the Cowboys White and Color uniforms are horrendously inconsistent (see my image below):
Click on the picture for the larger version.
Your UniDiction is after the jump.
The UniDiction
Either 2, 3, 6, or 7 points awarded for each category (safety, field goal, touchdown, touchdown+point after, of course)
Helmet
Eagles: 7 — Same as always. Definitely one of the best helmet designs in the league. I'm a sucker for "functional" helmet designs.
Cowboys: 6 — It’s iconic and perhaps the most understated detail in a $1.3 billion shrine to American opulence. One point is removed because the shade of Silver doesn’t match the Silver pants... either of them. (note: for color professionals out there, please spare me the “it’s difficult to match colors on different substrates, especially if metal fleck is a component.” I know, but they’ve had 40+ years to get it right!
Jersey
Eagles: 7 — When fans think of the "post-Cunningham" Eagles, they're picturing the Midnight Green jerseys. A unique, bold color, detailed strokes and drop shadows on the numbers, and nice use of logos on the sleeves and collar.
Cowboys: 6 — There are few things Eagles fans hate more than the sight of a Cowboys jersey, especially if it’s White. Objectively, it’s a 6 (the shoulder stripes break up the plain-ness of it, though the Black strokes on the sleeve stripes don’t match the stroke-less numbers), but subjectively, we’re giving it a 1. Objectively, it's a 6, so this week, it gets a 6.
Pants + Socks
Eagles: 6 — The White pants provide nice contrast with the solid green of the jersey, and instead of plain white, the thick Black ad Green stripes (with the pencil thin grey stripe) on the side of the pants gives them a slightly modern touch. Black over White socks also break up the White from the pants
Cowboys: 3 — OK, Cowboys. Get your colors figured out, and we’ll talk. I do like the sandwich stripes on the pants, though.
Intangibles
Eagles: 0 — Sure, I was complaining earlier in the season that the Eagles should skip the White at Home nonsense, and get out their Midnight Green jerseys ASAP, and I know beggars can't be choosers, but I'm going to beg and choose. They should've worn throwbacks this week.
Cowboys: 2 — I may have offered more points here if they were in their Navy over Silver combination (obscurity=points, people), but they’re not. Generally, they're a nice uniform set which is almost synonymous with "NFL" (similar to the effect of the Packers' uniforms), but they're still the Cowboys. Hey Jerry. How about making your uniforms…you know, uniform?
Final Score
Eagles 20
Cowboys 17
See you next week for a special Playoff Edition UniDiction!
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