Pirates_mermaidThird one from the right 

As always, John Mayberry Jr. mermaid posts are best read while listening to this song:

Oh holy hell.

Sometimes there are stories so awesome and ridiculous that you just drop everything and run to the computer. This is one of those stories.

John Mayberry Jr. seeks a mermaid.

Antoinette Nikprelaj, to be exact. She played one of the evil mermaids in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. The New York Post (always reliable…) has obtained the email sent by Mayberry's agency, CAA, to Innovative Artists, the Hollywood agency that counts Nikprelaj as one of their clients.

Ladies and gentlemen, the email:

I hate to even be sending you this e-mail, and I’m quite embarrassed to say the least, but we have a young client on the Philadelphia Phillies who asked us if we knew any agents at Innovative Artists and could connect him to Antoinette Nikprelaj.

I know you’re not a dating or set-up service, but John Mayberry Jr. (Phillies OF) would love to meet Antoinette or invite her to a baseball game sometime. Would this be possible?

Here’s a bio of John to give you some more info on him (he’s a great guy, down-to-earth, humble, Stanford-educated, etc.) Thanks for considering this as you know how this business is and servicing clients.

 

Awesome. Just awesome. 

Mayberrry_date

I’m not sure why Mayberry is going through all this trouble, though. There’s some talk from his teammates that he was thinking of joining Twitter. Perhaps now he will. He can simply send Nikprelaj a Tweet (@ItsAntoinette). 

Of course, whatever the means of communication, Mayberry may not get the response he's looking for. Nikprelaj is married. Or at least she was in February of this year, when this Oakland Press article was written:

Months of pre-production self-defense and weapons training have been grueling, but the sacrifice proving most difficult for the young star is being away from her husband Nua and 3-year-old daughter Gianna.

“I miss them so much,” said Nikprelaj. “They are my life, but I am doing this also for them, because I see a great potential to become successful.” 

 

Sorry, John. May we recommend another mermaid? Perhaps a redhead?

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[Related: John Mayberry-mermaid Photoshops]

H/T to (@AK47_NLbeast) and Bill for the links