We’re Going to Talk About Cody Asche’s Girlfriend Now

She's... the one on the left

She’s… the one on the left

Got a lot of Tweets about her the other night and, surprise!, she instantly grams herself! I’d give her a solid 8.5, pushing 9 in some pictures. Whereas our old friend Michael Schwimmmer went with brute force, Asche went girl next door. Which is the preferred choice.

Meet Angie (@angiealbers). She likes fun, sun, Cody Asche, the Phillies, the Cardinals and yoga.

Pictures after the jump. See, and who says things have been too real around here lately?


  1. Well played by Cody. Certainly a solid 8.5, so he left himself a little room to upgrade if he hits the big time in the majors.

  2. is cody asche larry brothers with bam margera. you have to do side by side with bam’s mom and asche’s mom. identical

  3. Southwest Philly Floater

    August 2, 2013 at 4:07 pm

    I’d eat her butt on a monday morning after a no-shower-sunday.

  4. Scwimmers chick is fucking hideous.

    Nicely done Cody, she is really, really nice. Good form!


  5. She’s cute and all but I hink Cody must have left her titties in the Minor Leagues dugout…. 😛

  6. Kid Charlemagne

    August 2, 2013 at 4:15 pm

    Nice of Cody’s mom to demonstrate for her how to massage Cody’s balls.

  7. I heard Cody almost cried when he saw his mom in the stands. I also cried when I saw his girlfriend, except mine came out of my penis….

  8. Blumpkin, Jelly Donut, or Hot Lunch? I mean for Wheels…Not This Dame….she seems like a chick who you can live with rolling over in the morning and seeing her without wanting to assault on the reg

  9. Slamming Gretzky's Daugjher

    August 2, 2013 at 4:24 pm

    Kyle, know anything about her friend in that second picture? I’d like a piece of that.

  10. also, i am loving the squirrel pelt on top of mrs. asche’s head, unlike the dead gopher on wheels. she’s the woman in the office you never make eye contact with, because you know she’s misearable and won’t say hi.

  11. Suzanne Sucks Pu$$y

    August 2, 2013 at 4:26 pm

    Girl next door holy fuck. I want to take a cock-shaped shit right into her little butthole.

  12. Candy from the Oak

    August 2, 2013 at 4:31 pm

    didn’t know his mom is from Delco

  13. Her friend in the second pic has some nice titties. I’d like to oil them up and have her envelop my huge rod and then I’ll bust off two times.

  14. Kid Charlemagne

    August 2, 2013 at 4:53 pm

    At least there’s no way a bunch of guys posting about how they would defile a cute little white girl could be considered offensive to anyone, is there?

  15. No tit no care

  16. Dusty Rhoades Joe Robertson

    August 2, 2013 at 5:22 pm

    I would lick her taint

  17. Maybe a 7. CB readers definitely need to get out more often if they consider her a 9.

  18. She looks like she could suck the bolts out of a battleship hull. The girlfriend is cute too.

    I would let her stomp up and down on my ding-a-ling while wearing Rich Gannon’s golf cleats.

  19. Michael Martinez

    August 2, 2013 at 6:01 pm

    I’d lick her pussy after she just got done working out

  20. A Classy Gentleman

    August 2, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    I love Lisa Hillary’s new Skrillex haircut and would definitely paste her eyelids shut behind a dumpster after porking her cornhole

  21. I would love to get her in a 69 position

  22. Johnny Pervert

    August 2, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    Wow! I have enough photos to last awhile. Gotta go get some more supplies. Cocoa Butter, Cucumber Melon Lotion, Baby Oil, etc. Excuse me while I rub one out!

  23. George "The Animal" Steele

    August 2, 2013 at 6:17 pm

    I’d eat the corn from her shit!

  24. How does Sean Brace & Jon Marks have a job in radio

    August 2, 2013 at 6:22 pm

    Fuck You for making me listen these clowns on the radio like Sean Brace, mike miss, racist Ike Reese and Da Cuz speak about the racism for a week.

  25. Rhea Hughe's Veal Cutlets

    August 2, 2013 at 6:22 pm

    I dunno. This is somehow….racist!

  26. How does Sean Brace & Jon Marks have a job in radio

    August 2, 2013 at 6:23 pm

    Also I would to sniff Ashe’s GF’s panties (unwashed)

    • 97.5 should actually give them a m-f morning show slot. Can’t listen to that clown Angelo. Also I would stick my dick in the future mrs Ashe

  27. Wonder if blacks are going to stop trying to fuck & rape white girls now because of Riley cooper

  28. Matt From South Jersey

    August 2, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    I hope you guys don’t kiss your mothers, girlfriends, wives, daughters, etc with those mouths. I find it quite appalling that you guys talk about a girl like that. I see that there are A LOT of virgins who only have had their dominant hands as sexual partners the way y’all talk about her on this site. Maybe if you guys were gentlemen like myself, you would all have a beautiful woman inside and out by your side that you would love to marry one day like I do, but from these comments, I find it highly unlikely.

  29. Better hope KC the traffic girl dosn’t get hold of him..her fangs are lethal..just ask Pettibone

  30. Chester Ihardlyknewher

    August 2, 2013 at 6:56 pm

    Cody your girl is subpar for a major leaguer and you need to start hitting the weights brah

  31. I bet you Cody plugs her booty hole while she does that crow position.

  32. chicks with a boy chest never get above a 5. those are teets not tits

  33. average white male

    August 3, 2013 at 12:23 pm

    I want to have sexual intercourse with her. My penis may be a 4 but u r a 10.

  34. Codys mom looks like a milf I plowed at a beat down delco bar.

  35. Candy from the Oak

    August 3, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    is that Dave Robert’s jew son bones behind them

  36. This site is a joke

    August 3, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    Kyles a Creepy Ass Cracker

  37. I would do Cody Ashe’s batting Avg. to her right now..

    yes, its hovering around a .069

  38. I am a gay and would still fill her up with bone juice.

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