The One Where Ruben Amaro Called Jayson Werth a Dumbass

Amaro_leeYou complete me

Tremendous article on about Ruben Amaro and, more specifically, the Cliff Lee signing. Most of the details of the deal have already been reported (including what we first reported right hither), but this part is just oozing with thick layers of awesome:

Conceding defeat, Proefrock sent Braunecker a text. “I feel sick about this,” he wrote. Braunecker’s response: “I feel the same way.” It was that response, so emotional, so devoid of cunning and games, that gave Proefrock the feeling that maybe, just maybe, there was still a shred of hope. They would make one last offer: $120 million. Five years.

Later that night, Amaro’s cell phone rang. “Ruben?” Once again, the voice of Braunecker on the other end. “You got Cliff back.”


I'm not going to lie, I got a little choked up at that last line. Somewhere, there is analogy to be made about college sweethearts breaking up then rekindling the flame via intriguing and mysterious text messages just days before the fecund protagonist was set to marry some rich, not as cool, but slightly more successful older dude. I just can't seem to find it. Either way, I'm moved.

Then there's this:

IT'S IRONIC, PERHAPS, that the first bit of feedback Amaro received after the good news broke was not one of praise, but derision. It came in the form of a text from the recently expatriated Jayson Werth. All it said was this:


“That reaction from Jayson was funny,” says Amaro in his office in February, again flashing that smile. “He was pissed off. He had just signed with Washington. He said to me, ‘You dumbass. You could’ve had both of us.’ And I said, ‘You’re the dumbass. You could have taken our arbitration offer.’”


I would have paid about $722 to see the reaction on Werth's face when Ruben fired that back at him. Of course, 100 bones will get you a trip to D.C. to see the bitter beard for yourself. Yay shameless plugs.

Great read from Philly Mag here.

[Related: Amaro and Proefrock ran out of gas yesterday]

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15 Responses

  1. Is it confusing that he’s been divorced for 10 years but has an 8 year old daughter with his ex-wife?
    Is it bad that this is what I first pick up on?

  2. If Cliff Lee is the college sweetheart then Jayson Werth is the vengeful ex girlfriend who tells you after you have broken up that she was open to threesomes…

  3. ashley- i’m ashamed i missed that face. looks like ruben was rekindling some old flames himself.
    ian- BUT ONLY if you did it with her slightly ugly third cousin, whom she trusted and respected greatly.

  4. Dude is so smug. I’ll have to break this article up into pieces so that my smugometer doesn’t burst.

  5. Someone call Vince McMahon and see if he can get Amaro and Werth into a steel cage for the next Wrestlemania. My money’s on Ruben.

  6. Ruben: YOU dumbass. We took you off the scrap heap, nursed you back to life, got you a ring and you ended up with a total contract that wont even fit on a fucking standard calculator. What more do you want? Go Fuck Yourself.

  7. I didn’t read the whole article yet, but this has to be the best part:
    “Hey Ruben. Got a minute? I’ve got Cliff and Kristen here in my office on speaker,” he tells Amaro.
    The next voice Amaro hears isn’t Cliff’s. It’s Kristen, his wife.
    “Ruben, you broke my heart once,” she tells him. “Please don’t break my heart again.”
    I <3 Kristen Lee.

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