Your Tuesday Morning Roundup

Phillies_stars_stripes_hatSooo… these were awful

Who’s sunburned and hungover? —-> This guy. Let me tell you what’s not a good idea: Trying to outsmart our star by applying lotion to only the sun-facing side of pasty blogger skin (most Shore vets know that, when facing the ocean, the sun will rotate around your right shoulder throughout the afternoon). Well, I now look like a hybrid of a candy cane and the outfield grass at CBP. Not good.

You know what else isn’t a good idea? The Hangover 2. It was like a Mad Lib of the first movie. Same story- different location, actions, and bachelor. The jokes weren't any different, either. The whole movie was basically just Alan mispronouncing things. It got old very, very fast. They took such little care to differentiate the two movies that it seems as if the second one was written in a day, leaning on the successful jokes of the first movie. Hey, do you remember when we showed Asian guy’s penis? Let’s do that again. Oh, and Alan’s funny. Make him borderline retarded. It was the funny-guy shock-humor equivalent of Speed 2, only you don’t get to stare at Sandra Bullock the whole time. There's even a boat-on-land scene, as if to say, "fuck it, we too sold out." For realsies, it was bad.

 

A couple of quick notes:

– Cole Hamels will be appearing at the BC Sports in the Manoa Shopping Center on June 25 from 10 am – 12 pm. You can get tickets to meet him here.

– Shop at Philly Phaithful for all of your t-shirt needs. The Bitter Beard Face t-shirt is wildly popular, as is the K-Lot All-Stars shirt, for all of you tailgaters. Shop… hither.

– If you haven’t done so yet, check out Crossing Broad Tickets. I promise you won’t shop anywhere else for Phillies tickets.

 

The roundup:

– Yesterday we told you that our friends at Philly Sports Daily launched their redesign- It’s beautiful. Today, they shock the city. Bill Lyon joins their staff as a twice a week columnist. That’s right, six-time Pulitzer nominee Bill Lyon writing for Philly Sports Daily. Oh, you thought we were joking with the Philly media takeover? We were not.

His debut column will be Thursday.

– Chooch mocked the Mets on Friday night.

– Vance Worley and Michael Stutes looked slick on an NY Subway. Worley… is now in the minors.

– Roy Halladay was so hot and sweaty (not a porn post) that he had to change his entire uniform in the fifth inning yesterday.

– Jeff Carter bought Funyuns over the weekend, but Chuck Gormley talked to Paul Holmgren, who didn’t deny the possibility of trading One Seven.

– Something, something Michael Vick holding workouts.

Phillies fan invaded D.C. More on that soon.

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9 Responses

  1. People need to relax about the hangover 2. What did you expect? it’s not like there was some outstanding story line left from the first one. They tried to get the same cheap laughs that they got in the first one. You have to admit you laughed at the “My name is Alan, and I’m a stay at home son” line.

  2. I realize it’s become the “cool thing” to hate on Hangover 2 but I liked it. Yeah it’s the same formula, but wtf did you honestly expect going in?

  3. look, i’m usually overly-apologetic for movies and music i like. But my god, that was awful. It was literally the same movie. I didn’t have as much of a problem with that, though. It was the simple fact that the writers were painfully lazy. They used every joke they used in the first one, only re-worded it. It’s one thing to follow the same path, it’s another to use the EXACT same jokes, with different nouns. Sure, there were a few funny parts. But they were hardly original.

  4. Was Dan Steinberg at a different game from the one I watched?
    In other news: one of the Nats commentators said they could see game 1 of a World Series at that park soon. Maybe they thought it was a Phillies home game

  5. i got your back, Kyle.
    when you guys ask “what did you expect?” to someone who doesn’t like a particular movie, you realize you’re just giving the studios more license to put out absolute crap and nothing else. because you “expect” nothing else and will “pay” for absolute crap.
    good work.

  6. “Who’s sunburned and hungover? —-> This guy… Well, I now look like a hybrid of a candy cane and the outfield grass at CBP. Not good.
    You know what else isn’t a good idea? The Hangover 2… For realsies, it was bad.”
    Sounds like somebody forgot to change his soiled tampon for a clean one this weekend. Hahahahahahah

  7. “The biggest problem with so many visiting (Philly) fans is in the ceremony: the home team (Nats) getting booed during intros, the crowd rising to its feet with two strikes and two outs in the bottom of the ninth, the home team’s home run ball getting tossed back onto the field. (HAHAHAA) It just hurts a little bit in the chest cavity, makes you feel a little bit defensive and a little bit ashamed.”
    Mission accomplished. Heh.

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