Jason Whitlock was on Colin Cowherd’s show today because sports fucking hate you. Cowherd, that kid in high school who was cool but just a notch below super popular because he looked like he wore makeup and might one day kill his parents while they slept, listened as Whitlock, an asshole with a top hat, explained why he thinks Chip Kelly is going to the university of Miami:

“I wanna say this: My prediction is, Colin, Chip Kelly will be the next head coach a the University of Miami. At the U. Chip Kelly. They can pay the money, if you go look at his coaching staff there’s guys on that coaching staff with Miami connections. Thos athletes, in Chip Kelly’s offense at the University of Miami, will be tremendous. That’s my prediction.”

There are too many sports channels.