Lane Johnson Is a Spineless Jellyfish

You know what, fuck this guy. Lane Johnson is a coward. The kind of coward who foolishly (and incorrectly) rips fans and then has the PR knucklehead who handles his Twitter account tweet out a necessary apology. The kind of guy who stands around midfield while the rest of his line mates sprint to keep up with the play. And the kind of guy who waits until his coach is fired to attached his name to damning comments accusing the coach of being unapproachable, not knowing how to relate, and butting heads with the front office. Maybe part of the problem was spineless A-holes like Johnson, who wait to take parting shots on canned coaches. Yeah, that’s the kind of guy you want on your team. I don’t think I could have any less respect for Johnson after this. It’s always everyone else’s fault– the fans’ fault, the coach’s fault, the front office’s fault. Never Lane’s. Eject him into the ether with the rest of castaways this roster is stocked with.

UPDATE: I can’t believe people are defending him in the comments. Say it to the coach, when he’s here, or, if you really have balls, publicly when he’s here. What good does piling on do? And I’d be willing to bet that Johnson was absolutely one of the many anonymous sources we heard from this year.

Here’s some more to illustrate the point: 

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  • jimmy from boston December 30, 2015 at 2:35 pm

    Kyle, is it safe to assume you will be outside of Lane’s house in the next 45 minutes?

    • dz December 30, 2015 at 3:20 pm

      look at k-c making the ny post

      • Nicky Negadelphia December 30, 2015 at 3:32 pm

        Kyle had no problem with Jason Kelce piling on Desean Jackson but has a problem with Lane Johnson being critical of Chip Kelly.

        Sounds like a double standard to me.

    • cheesedick December 31, 2015 at 11:12 am

      Kyle, you’re a coward . Call Lane up on the phone or set up a sitdown with the man and tell him he’s a coward to his face. He’ll smack that ugly delco look right off your face. If he said those things to chip’s face (like some of the other players did) he’d be unemployed. You’re out of your element on this one dude….cheesdick!

  • Tommy Joseph December 30, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    It’s a lose-lose situation.

    Saying something while Chip is still coach would cause awkwardness, benching or cutting.
    Saying something after Chip leaves is viewed as being cowardly.

  • Paul December 30, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    64K, not bad for sitting in your living room, but try raising your kids on that.

  • Fire Jim Adair December 30, 2015 at 2:38 pm

    Kyle honestly, go fuck yourself.

    Lane Johnson is far from spineless, and is probably one of like 6 players on this team that doesn’t suck that Chip managed not to get rid of.

    We all know you love Chip but honestly, fuck off.

    • Johnny Nas December 30, 2015 at 2:43 pm

      I’m going to have to agree with this guy….it seems like you have become a Chip apologist for some reason….Chip was terrible managing the team, and worse with with his on field coaching….this guy was made a genius before he won anything….

  • Dennis December 30, 2015 at 2:41 pm

    I hate the shit he says too, but why would he put his name on a quote ripping the coach during the season when Chip had proven to have a quick trigger for guys who don’t fully buy in?

  • Jim "JR" Ross December 30, 2015 at 2:41 pm

    get off Lane Johnson’s back. at least he has the guts to say something

  • EG December 30, 2015 at 2:41 pm

    Kyle you are way off base here.
    At least he has the balls to say something. How many guys on this team refuse to comment?

    Lane Johnson is one of the few good players on this team that we want back.

  • ... December 30, 2015 at 2:42 pm

    Bad month for the Crossing Broad brain trust. First their favorite GM is reduced to a figurehead, then their boy from Oregon gets his walking papers.

  • Koy Detmer December 30, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    Better this than another “anonymous” player comment.

  • Get over it December 30, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    Chip is fired. He was an awful coach. Hop off his rod please.

  • Real Life Guy December 30, 2015 at 2:45 pm

    Obvious Kyle hasn’t worked in the REAL World. There is a political stance that all employees have to take with the boss where their true feelings lay dormant and only come out when one or the other are relieve of their duties. Ask Jim?

  • Paul Jolovitz Fan Club President December 30, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    Jesus Kyle sucks.

    He was the biggest Chip Bot in the world. Refuses to criticism him. Fell hook, line and sinker for everything that fat fraud said/. Attacked anyone who dared questioned him. Killed the players, all good, who he ran out of town. Complained about Chip’s hires like Billy Davis and Kiko Alonso, but never about the man doing the hiring.

    Now it’s Lane Johnson’s fault. Kyle, you suck.

  • Tom December 30, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    So you are mad he said the same shit a bunch of players who said the same things anomously? At least he put his name on it. So he was asked a question and answered and you are mad? So you love how Chip got rid of our best talent replaced it with mediocre talent and set our franchise back 3 to 5 years with spending tons of loot on free agents that didnt pan out? Chips playbook was limited and so was “his guys”. Hes not cut out for the NFL his totaltarian attitude and lack a daisy emotion and lack of drive and treating his players like children and throwing everyone but himself under the bus for his team losing is why people are shit baggin him now.

  • Joe December 30, 2015 at 2:56 pm

    Jason Peters quits on his team in the middle of a game that makes or breaks the season:
    Kyle: “I can totally understand where this guy is coming from. In fact, I would actually like to give that big teddy bear a reach around”

    Lane Johnson stating he can see that there were issues in the locker room and front office:

    • CBGA Ball Washer December 30, 2015 at 4:21 pm

      Kyle Scott hates white people.

      • Mike Missanelli December 31, 2015 at 3:12 am

        Don’t we all brah? C’mon man, look within and you’ll find the truth.

  • Sure You Don't Mean Chip? December 30, 2015 at 3:02 pm

    “It’s always everyone else’s fault– the fans’ fault, the coach’s fault, the front office’s fault. Never Lane’s”

    Can you name one single issue that Chip took responsibility for?

    • Pretty Simple: December 30, 2015 at 3:08 pm


      And on that note, when do you think Kyle will publicly take responsibility for HIS disastrous hiring of Jim Adair?

    • ... December 30, 2015 at 3:09 pm

      POS wouldnt even admit to being responsible for the personnel moves this offseason. In his mind, nothing was ever his fault.

    • Jamie Himmelberger December 31, 2015 at 8:30 am

      Chip said this season was all on him. Sounds like taking responsibility to me.

  • Johnny Nas December 30, 2015 at 3:04 pm

    “Say it to the coach, when he’s here, or, if you really have balls, publicly when he’s here”

    You mean like McCoy last year, or Demarco this year?

    This guy wouldnt even say hello to the players in the hallways, do you think he created an environment with an open door who players could express their dislikes…..Chip created an atmosphere, if you dont do it my way, or like my way….then see ya later….and it backfired on Chip when the team started losing….

  • Paging that ENORMOUS Retard, Kyle Scott December 30, 2015 at 3:06 pm

    W O W you are a fucking moron.

    How is attaching one’s name to a quote (or in this case a series of quotes) a cowardly act? Is he supposed to rip his boss while working for him, you fucking dunce?!?

    My god we all know you swallowed for Chip, but this all your screaming and hand-wringing over Johnson’s comments only serve to make you look like a bigger pussy than we all thought before, as hard as that is to fathom.

    Fuck off, Kyle. I can’t wait to hear your cries when that over-rated dope Jay Wright who gets bounced out of the tourney 1st round gets shit-canned, you loser.

  • EG December 30, 2015 at 3:06 pm

    “Say it to the coach, when he’s here, or, if you really have balls, publicly when he’s here.”
    You have no idea if he did or did not say it to Chip while he was here. And if he did, do you think it would have mattered?

    “And I’d be willing to bet that Johnson was absolutely one of the many anonymous sources we heard from this year.”
    You have no idea. This is just throwing shit at the wall and hoping it sticks.

    Still think you are way off base.

  • dave December 30, 2015 at 3:11 pm

    I honestly don’t know what he said was wrong? All of it was true.

    • DDMFsD December 30, 2015 at 3:17 pm

      It doesn’t matter if it’s true. He talked bad about Kylie’s man crush chipper. Doesn’t Lane know that chipper is a brilliant football mind that is going to change the way football is played forever? Doesn’t Lane know that Chip is going to lead the Eagles to a Super Bowl this year and the excitement will rival that of the 2004 season? Doesn’t Lane know that chipper is a football genius and has won championships at every level he’s ever been at?

  • Ron hipple December 30, 2015 at 3:15 pm

    Omg omg omg smh foh ttyl

  • " Say it to his FACE!!!! " December 30, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Kinda like how you’re saying all this shit to Lane’s face about him being a coward and all, right, tough guy?

    You gotta love some yuppy blogger sitting in his footy pj’s typing away about guys 4x’s their size being cowards.

    Yeah, Kyle, clearly you’re the alpha-dog on the Philly sports scene.

    What a joke.

  • would love to eat sue Serio's asshole December 30, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Good for lane. At least he had the balls to say it baby

  • K Shaw December 30, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Relax Kyle, save your fake anger and outrage for a controversy that matters.

  • Shut it Down December 30, 2015 at 3:21 pm

    This firing is a god send. I was dreading having to listen to Mike Miss invent new game shows for the next few months. “And today folks is Tricky question Tuesday…”

  • Jillian's Meat Curtains December 30, 2015 at 3:28 pm

    This is funnier than the Dream team episode. Chip set this franchise back a solid 3 years minimum. Realistically I would be shocked if they get out of the 1st round before 2020.

  • KYLE IS A CHIP OFF THE OL' BLOCK December 30, 2015 at 3:31 pm

    Seriously Kyle?

    This guy is one of the only solid linemen we have on the Team and nothing that he states is slanderous. Chip was in over his head and completely lost the fan-base, the team and the leaders in the organization. For once get of Chip’s salami and see it for what it is – a failed attempt at trying to be the smartest guy in the NFL. Chip sucked and deservedly was given his walking papers… F Chip and his ridiculous offensive scheme.

  • Eggs December 30, 2015 at 3:31 pm

    As opposed to a jellyfish that has a spine? Gosh Kyle, open a book sometime you idiot fuck

  • Lane's Balls December 30, 2015 at 3:35 pm

    Deez Nuts, Kyle… Choke on them!

  • Youre on the wrong side of this one kyle December 30, 2015 at 3:38 pm

    Par for the course though

  • Kyle: "Oh Shit! I'll just change the author this post to Jim." December 30, 2015 at 3:39 pm

    Been following this site for years. And I have never so fully disagreed with one of your takes as this. Makes absolutely no sense for him to mouth off with the coach here. None! And sure, go ahead and vent when he’s gone. Who gives a shit.

  • MM December 30, 2015 at 3:40 pm

    Kyle is so consistently wrong in his assessment of sports figures in this town he’s decided to take a new tack, a page out of Missanelli and Eskin’s books, never admit your wrong until you have to. he was wrong on RAJ, he was wrong on Richards and Carter, he flipped on RAJ and he’s never admitted he was wrong on Richards and now he’s wrong on chip. He really doesn’t have to admit he’s wrong until chip fails his way back into the college ranks so push it on down the line. This is what you have to do if you feel you have to prognosticate in your blog to keep things interesting because you never actually get off your ass and legit report on the subject your blog is about. Kyle doesn’t know a whole lot about sports, Kyle knows T-shirts…

  • Dead Air Dave December 30, 2015 at 3:43 pm

    Marcus Smith said he “was ecstatic” to hear that Chip Kelly got fired. Does that make him a jellyfish too?

  • Mickey Mannequin December 30, 2015 at 3:45 pm

    Kyle, i dont understand why you dont understand the reaction in the comments here. Your readership is the same as the morons who call sports radio 3-4 times a week. I see the same people in the comments section, just like you hear the same people calling in to sports radio stations. These are the “passionate fans” of philadelphia.

    Chip sucked this year,especially as a coach, there is now way around that. But a lot of the players on this team, players who are talented mind you, really shit the bed this season and played nowhere near to their capabilities. Some may say that is the responsibility of the coach and that is right to a degree, but just look at Lane Johnson, How many dumbass penalties did this guy have this year? How many times did he just flat out screw up blocking assignments? Neither of those things are “sexy topics” like Chip not speaking to players in the hallway or He got rid of the good black players……those are the things that are talked about on sports radio because the hosts don’t know anything about football. The lapdogs here live and die with sports radio (ever wonder why your radio wars posts have the most comments? the jackasses here spend all day hanging on every word because they don’t have the social skills to exist in the real world) This team didn’t lose games because they got rid of talented players (still waiting for someone to tell me what those guys chip got rid of ever won?) or because Chip “couldn’t relate to the young black players on his team”…..yea i’m sure Ron Rivera and Cam Newton go over what dance he does when he scores a TD next week or John Fox debates who won the beef between Meek Mill and Drake with Alshonn Jeffrey. The team lost because Chip shrunk his playbook and became extremely vanilla and when these players were actually put into position to make plays, they dropped the ball…..literally.

    • BRIANDAWKINS#20 December 30, 2015 at 3:57 pm


  • Amanda December 30, 2015 at 3:47 pm

    OL are always the biggest drama queens .

  • Brennan Huff December 30, 2015 at 4:15 pm

    Kyle is like, “Lane better not get in my face……..cause I’ll drop that m*****f*****.”

  • CBGA Ball Washer December 30, 2015 at 4:26 pm

    >Rips Stephen A Smith for his ridiculous hot takes that are crafted solely to draw attention

    >Makes the same type of hot take to rile up the fans, along with an update to further flame them

    It’s either that or you are absurdly stupid, Kyle. Oh yes, Lane should have definitely called out his coach publicly while the guy had a job. That would be an incredibly smart decision because every future coach would just LOVE to have a guy like that. You have no idea if he approached Chip about how players felt privately.


  • Score December 30, 2015 at 5:54 pm

    Commenters 100…..Kylie 0

  • Wait a minute... December 30, 2015 at 6:25 pm

    I totally agree, Kyle, well said.

  • Bill December 30, 2015 at 7:03 pm

    Hey Kyle what’s the big deal? Nothing that Lane said that was Tweeted out isn’t really that bad. He said there was tension between Howie and Kelly or certain players thought Chip was unapproachable. What’s there to hide about or what’s he piling on ? He’s just saying what he thinks it’s all about. Most of us know Chip is an arrogant unapproachable guy and some players had problems with that. It wasn’t like he came out and said Chip beats up woman in his office on Mondays after a loss. Besides the kind of person you are if your at some event and Lane Johnson is there I bet you won’t go near him because he would mop the floor with a little twerp like you. I won’t hide behind this keyboard either. Email me and I’ll give you my phone number and we can meet and I’ll tell you your a crumb to your face.

  • Ron Burgundy December 30, 2015 at 7:36 pm

    Well, that escalated quickly.

  • Spizzy December 30, 2015 at 9:39 pm

    Settle down Kyle. He’s the future LT for now. Probably a little emotional and he’s a young kid on top of it.

  • Stop Bitchn' December 31, 2015 at 11:19 am

    I’m guessing Villanova isn’t getting enough pub in the papers lately. This is the same way you bitch when Nova gets slighted. Go back to writing about Radio Wars or something. Oh, wait, don’t do that either…. Maybe you should just track Chip, his babe and his dog’s flight back to New Hampshire or something.

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