Lane Johnson Is about to Get PAID

Photo credit: Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

Lane Johnson, the run-blocking, flag-receiving, PED-using, fan-blaming, excuse-making offensive lineman, is about to get paid.

Jeff McLane reports that the Eagles and Johnson are nearing a huge deal. Eliot Shorr-Parks says Johnson will receive more guaranteed money than any other right tackle in the NFL:

Great. But now that Johnson is firmed up, it might be time to talk about Cox.

UPDATE: According to multiple sources, Johnson’s deal is worth a maximum of $63 million with $35 million guaranteed.

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18 Comments

  • Don Tollefson January 29, 2016 at 10:14 am

    Any word on what Natalie Engenolf is wearing today?

    Reply
  • Kyle Scott Has a Mangina January 29, 2016 at 10:39 am

    Kyle your site blows now, articles like this and your awful take on pretty much everything Philly sports has run its course.

    Hiring Jim was the beginning of the end.

    Reply
    • DMX January 29, 2016 at 10:45 am

      Oh, you thought you was raw?
      Boom, not anymore,
      Cause now you on the floor, wishing you never saw,
      Me walk through that door with that .44
      Now it’s time for bed, two more to the head,
      Got the floor red, yeah, that nigga’s dead.
      Another unsolved mystery, it’s goin’ down in history!

      Reply
  • Paul Jolovitz Fan Club President January 29, 2016 at 10:39 am

    Anyone see the Periscope Marks did yesterday? Gargano was in there for a bit and he looks exactly like Big Pussy from The Sopranos. Like exactly. Dude was dressed like goomba garbage wearing a track suit from the 90’s.

    MCW aint half bad

    Reply
    • Bob January 29, 2016 at 10:44 am

      For major health reasons, Gargano should definitely lay off the Primos hoagies.

      How does MCW let that fat tub of goo crawl on top of her?

      Reply
  • DMX January 29, 2016 at 10:43 am

    Arf, arf!
    Yeah, yeah, yeah…
    (Grr!)
    Uh, yo’don’t get it twisted,
    This rap shit, is mine,
    Motherfucker, it’s not a fucking game!
    Fuck what you hear.

    Reply
  • Phil from Mount Airy January 29, 2016 at 10:43 am

    Has anyone checked out Sean Brace site? Dude be killin it. Him and I are going to start doing some you tube videos together.

    Reply
  • Adam Reigner January 29, 2016 at 10:50 am

    Wait, Gargano and MCW have something going on? I thought he was married? Please fill me in!

    Reply
  • What about da Brotha's January 29, 2016 at 10:55 am

    Hey, Rosebud, … you signing all the white guys. What about my brotha’s …Cox, Curry, Thornton, Logan…Come on, Man.

    Reply
    • Davis January 29, 2016 at 11:32 am

      $63M, with $35.5M guaranteed…damn

      Reply
  • Boofin Bill January 29, 2016 at 10:57 am

    Really crushing the word count on articles this week.

    Reply
  • Rob Ellis' Fake ID January 29, 2016 at 11:00 am

    Gargano is either divorced or separated because he references his apartment several times which makes me think that he lost the house. Why else would a morning show host live in an apartment? He also talks about driving her everyday. And let’s be honest, there’s no way she earned that job with her reading skills. She sounds worse than the person who did morning announcements in high school.

    Reply
    • gurgelano January 29, 2016 at 11:06 am

      DAT’S RIGHT!

      Reply
  • Davis January 29, 2016 at 11:12 am

    just announced…six years. so um what about Fletcher Cox?

    Reply
  • GayJeffySuxCox January 29, 2016 at 12:04 pm

    The best GM in the league is making these deals…..DOn’t worry sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppp I am only raising your ticket prices by 22% AND kicking parking up to $50…why? because I am a gay Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu and I can.

    Reply
  • I wouldn't pay it January 29, 2016 at 12:22 pm

    He’s just not that good. He’s an average right tackle.

    Reply
  • Truth January 29, 2016 at 11:46 pm

    Wow! It would be way cheaper to sign My Johnson.

    Reply
  • Doug Pederson January 29, 2016 at 11:53 pm

    “Huh? Johnson or Cox? I don’t see what the big debate is… Whether it’s Johnson or Cox, at the end of the day, they’re pretty much just pricks.”

    Reply
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