Forget trolling the commenters in my opening salvo, ain’t nobody got time for that when it’s Sam Bradford trade day!

Bradford’s departure from Philadelphia has been a fait accompli ever since the organization drafted Carson Wentz– it was just a matter of how and when. Turns out it required the explosion of Teddy Bridgewater’s knee. Up until this week, the Eagles were more than content to keep Bradford as the lame duck starter for 2016 and explore trade possibilities in the offseason, all the while crossing their fingers that a team with high hopes for this season became quarterback needy and was forced to deal from a position of weakness. The Vikings’ loss is the Eagles’ gain, and now we have even more reason to be excited about 2016 and beyond.

I sat down on the train at 10:30 and within five minutes my phone started blowing up with text messages that expressed utter disbelief and total euphoria. I opened Twitter and Eagles fans were parading down [editor’s note: or Crossing] Broad. Then I saw that Howie Roseman had pulled off the pinnacle of a master stroke move and fleeced the panicked, desperate Vikings for a first round pick in 2017 and fourth round pick in 2018 in exchange a quarterback who, if everything goes right, might be able to help them get to eight or nine wins and an early playoff exit. I can’t even being to tell you how fucking pumped I am to watch Sam Bradford with Matt Kalil as his left tackle. I kinda feel bad for him simultaneously, but not really since I am bound by law to vigorously root against his new team.

So, what does this mean for the Eagles? This season becomes a carbon copy of 1999 with Chase Daniel as Doug Pederson and Carson Wentz as Donovan McNabb (hopefully this squad can manage, say, four or five more wins than that one). It’s not a matter of if Wentz will start, but when. The majority of people are, understandably, pointing to Week 5 after the bye. I don’t know if that’s too soon because I don’t know how the Eagles feel about Wentz’s development, but in making this trade they can’t be that uncomfortable with the prospect of throwing him into the fire. Since Daniel is sure to suck, I can’t imagine a scenario short of injury where Wentz isn’t the starter by midseason.

*checks Twitter again*

Allow me to amend the above to read that I can’t imagine a scenario where Wentz isn’t the starter as soon as he’s fully healed and ready to play.

The whole rebuild has been accelerated, and there’s no upside for the Eagles to half-ass this. Besides, in today’s NFL it’s very rare that a quarterback picked at the top of the first round doesn’t end up starting right away. The Eagles were ready to essentially punt on this season and ride it out with Bradford while letting Wentz sit and learn. But recouping the first round pick they relinquished was just too good to pass up. It would’ve been general manager malpractice had Roseman not pounced here. Say what you want about him, but he’s aggressive, opportunistic, decisive, and things are never not interesting when he’s at the controls.

Now I’m feeling greedy. Hey, Howie, if you’re reading, while you have Rick Spielman bent over a barrel, get him to take Nelson Agholor and our second round pick in 2017 for Stefon Diggs. I believe in you.

Bring on Week 1. Bring on the future.

PS – Has Michael Vick tweeted yet begging the Eagles to sign him?