Jon Werthheim had a terrific segment on 60 Minutes last night about Shohei Ohtani, “Japan’s Babe Ruth,” a two-way player who throws 102 mph and bats left. If he sounds like Steve Nebraska, that’s because he basically is. And he plans on coming to the U.S. next year.

Ohtani’s Nippon-Ham manager and teammates, one of whom played for the Yankees, say they’ve never seen a player like him. He’s considered to be the best player not in the Majors, which is like what they used to say about Jiri Dopita in hockey, so he’s basically a sure thing.

The 22-year-old could lose a lot of money if he comes over before he turns 25, due to MLB’s CBA, which would cap his salary at a measly $6 million. Ohtani, however, because he’s a walking folk tale much like Dario Saric, says he wants to come over anyway and doesn’t really care what he makes. He also wants to be assured that he can remain a pitcher and an everyday hitter.

The obvious assumption is that he’ll land with the Yankees, Red Sox, Mariners or Dodgers due to either or both their familiarty with Asian players and the marketing opportunities those markets can provide.

BUT.

As we’ve established, Ohtani is ripped from the pages of a Disney script, and the one thing to which he is most looking forward about the Major Leagues is pitching against Bryce Harper and batting against Clayton Kershaw. Guess which league you can’t do that in on a regular basis? Yeah, the American. Guess which league – no, more, division – you could play in and face Bryce Harper A WHOLE LOT? The NL East. And guess which team in the NL East has GOOBLES of money to spend, huge, gaping roster vacancies, and the stated desire to spend big on superstars (in this case, they wouldn’t have to)? Yeah, signing a two-way Japanese kid seems like exactly the sort of progressive and unconventional thing Klentak has paid lip service to these past couple years. And, what would be better, after conquering Bryce Harper for a full season, than to welcome him onto your team after he becomes a free agent? After all, it is Japanese tradition to partner with your enemy once they’re defeated.*

*I have no idea if this is true, but it sounds like it is.

So yeah, that’s my plan– sign Ohtani and then Bryce Harper. This GM-ing thing is easy.

The full segment is after the jump.

https://youtu.be/y5XiobgdYoY

https://youtu.be/n86fC9XA9Tk