The Phillies need to take a page out of the Cubs’ book and bring the beer bats to CBP. Look how happy these Midwesterners are:

They sell them at Cardinals and Braves games too:

The Rockies take it a step further and everyone knows the elevation gets you drunker quicker. So don’t tell me the Phils brass are worried about over-serving people:

This is the least the team could do now that they’re cutting off an hour of our drinking time with the pitch clock and also mark the return of draft beer. In Clearwater they run for $22 for 1.5 beers and were a hit when I was there a couple weeks ago. Obviously because the entire organization sells them, except for the Phils:

https://twitter.com/RussLydon82/status/1421619231158906880?s=20

via @MLBFoodie on Twitter

Who at Aramark is sleeping on the job? They’d be a best seller and an even better marketing tool when video circulates of a Phillies fan beating a Mets fan with it while the giant red “P” is front and center. Brand identity is important. People thought it was the end of Nike when Zion splooged through his shoes. Last I checked, he signed for $75 mil. Would you rather buy the Bud Light tall boy you’re just going to throw out, or do you want to buy the cool bat you can stick in the trunk of your car and chug out of every time you tailgate in the parking lot? It’s easy. RELEASE THE BATS!