Giants tight end Darren Waller retired at the age of 31:

Jordan Raanan at ESPN wrote this about a November health scare: “Waller detailed a “very scary situation” during which he struggled to breathe and ultimately spent 3½ days in the hospital unable to stand up, use the restroom or feed himself. Waller didn’t disclose the exact nature of the illness he battled. “I come out of that experience and I’m sitting in the hospital, and I go back into my daily life and I’m like, ‘Pretty clear, I almost just lost my life, and I don’t know if I really feel if I would have died that I would have felt great about how my life was going if I died at that time.'” Upon reflecting, he said he “found a lot of joy” and “had amazing moments” playing in the NFL “but the passion has slowly been fading,” leading to his retirement decision.”

Dude’s been through a lot lately. He’s had health issues, his marriage with Kelsey Plum ended, and then he made a goofy ass music video about the divorce. Maybe he can collaborate with C.J. Gardner-Johnson in an auto-tune-off, to see who can produce the worst audio since Bruce released Lucky Town. 

Waller played 12 games for the Giants last season, limited by a hamstring injury. He finished with 552 yards and a touchdown on 52 receptions. The New York depth chart at tight end now includes the totally mid Daniel Bellinger, rookie draft pick Theo Johnson, former Eagle Jack Stoll, and some guy named Chris Manhertz.

Congrats to Waller on a solid career, yeah? He was a Pro Bowler with the Raiders. But how do you lose this woman? –


Stephen A Smith voice: HOW DO YOU DO THAT!? HOW DO YOU DO THAT!? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?