Sometimes when you sit and examine your house for too long you think you’re the only person going through the madness. Like everyone’s got it figured out but you. Then you go online, or outside, or talk to friends and you realize people have it even worse than you and you wonder why you were even worried in the first place. Take the Dallas Cowboys, for instance. They haven’t won a home game yet and now Jerry Jones is threatening to fire the radio hosts during his weekly spot because they asked him tough questions:

It’s a circus over there. Supreme Leader Jerry Jong Un threatening to censor the radio station because he’s being asked about his offseason moves. Honestly, if he did hire new guys it’d be the most free agents he signed this season.

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again. We have to keep Saddam HuJerry alive forever. Jeffrey Lurie should drop everything and head over to one of those pharma companies in the Navy Yard and figure out some kind of gene therapy advancement that we can keep this old bag of bones alive forever. Because as long as Mao ZeJerry is at the helm there will never be another Super Bowl in Dallas.

Look at some of the reaction from the beats that cover the team. What kind of state-run media propaganda is Jerry overseeing down there? You can tell all the beats who cover the team walk on egg shells. Here’s a collection of tweets and there’s nothing critical. If this was Jeffrey Lurie saying this on WIP you’d think there would be some Eagles beats calling bullshit:

That last one doesn’t even seem like a real tweet from a real reporter. That guy’s gotta be on the payroll.