Eagles

I Wrote a Deathcore Song to Protest the Fake News Media and Salty Chiefs Fans Who are Trying to Get the Tush Push Banned

By Kevin Kinkead

Published: Sep 18th, 2025 · 4:00 PM EDT

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The Tush Push is under siege from salty Chiefs fans and petty media members who hate the Philadelphia Eagles. People like Joe Schad and the disappointing Stan Verrett.

They say the Birds false start “every time” on the play, but conveniently remain silent when the defense lines up in the neutral zone. They say it’s not “a football play,” but apparently a regular quarterback sneak is. They say it ruins the pace of play, or that it’s not entertaining, but have no problem with a quarterback spiking the ball to stop the clock. They say it’s a health and safety issue, even though there’s no data to support.

So I wrote a deathcore song in protest. It’s titled “Tush Push” –

"if everybody could do it, everybody would do it"

The Tush Push is under siege from Chiefs fans and petty media members who hate the Philadelphia Eagles.

So I wrote a deathcore song in protest: pic.twitter.com/46Grfh9WHT

— Kevin Kinkead (@Kevin_Kinkead) September 18, 2025

What do you think? Pretty brutal, right? I was going to use an image of McNabb puking, because it looked hardcore, but opted for snarky Sirianni instead.

lyrics:

if everybody could do it

they would do it

(repeat several times)

I believe it turned out well, and by “turned out well” I mean the artificial intelligence did a great job of reading my instructions and generating appropriately. I did the sound drops afterward and a slight bit of editing, but all told, this took about 13 minutes to make. Technology is incredible. The future of music is here! Stand aside, mumble rappers.

disclaimer: This is just a shit post, strictly for laughs, not profit. Nobody makes money on metal music anyway, not unless you’re Lars Ulrich and suing Napster for $10 million.