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I’ll Be Brave Enough to Say What We’re All Thinking: I Miss Tobias Harris and James Harden
By Matt Schultz
Published:
It’s been four days since the Knicks completed their sweep of the Sixers. Daryl Morey has been fired. Bob Myers is looking for a replacement. Everyone’s moving on. I am moving on. It took a minute to process the Sixers’ latest humiliation, but my wounds have healed enough, and on Wednesday night I was ready to watch the NBA playoffs again. So I flipped on the Cavs and Pistons OT thriller.
It was great. For the first few minutes of the first quarter, I took stock of how refreshing it was to watch playoff basketball without the specter of the loser-ass Sixers hanging over me. I didn’t need to stress. I could simply enjoy the game.
But the Sixers didn’t stay out of mind for long. Pretty early in the first quarter, I was thrown by a surprise realization I never thought I’d have… I’ll say it… I’m man enough to admit it…
I miss our old buddies Tobias and Harden. They’re doing cool stuff. Look at this cool stuff they’ve been doing:
Let me be clear: I’m not saying I currently want Tobias and Harden on the Sixers. I do not. What I’m saying is, watching these guys play meaningful basketball and contribute to winning has me reminiscing about when they were here, and I’ve reached this conclusion: Those were good times!
It didn’t feel like it back then, of course – those Sixers wildly underperformed, they weren’t athletic, they couldn’t rebound, they weren’t deep, Tobias didn’t come close to living up to his max contract, James Harden shrunk when it mattered most, they couldn’t defend, they were infuriating to root for, Doc Rivers was the coach, etc. etc. etc. – but I’d take that fan experience over our current one any day of the week. Remember 2023? Remember being up on the Celtics 3-2? Remember Harden in that series before Game 7? It was, without question, sick:
If you somehow forgot, after going up 3-2 on the Celtics, the Sixers were favored to win the Finals:
That’s the moment I miss. I remember that feeling, right after Game 5. I really thought the Sixers were gonna do it. I’m dumb as hell. But even knowing what happened next – the series turned to shit, Harden scored 13 points in Game 6 and nine points in Game 7, Tobias had 2 points in Game 6 (2 points!!!), the entire Sixers team pretty much no-showed Game 7, utter humiliation, I can still feel the residual shame in my stomach – I think back on that time fondly. The hope of it. It was nice to have hope.
Those Sixers were right there. It’s maybe as close as they’ll ever get. For that reason, it’s a time worth being sentimental about. Fans of good franchises will not understand this, and it’s not my job to make them. I don’t give a rat’s ass. I miss Tobias and Harden. I miss the illusion of competence and potential.
And now one of Tobi or Harden will play in the Eastern Conference Finals. Good for them. Should have been us.
Matt Schultz is a comedy and sports writer from Philadelphia. He’s written extensively for ClickHole, The Onion, and Conan O’Brien’s Team Coco. His work has been featured in Vulture, Deadspin, The A.V. Club, Paste Magazine, and other publications. Much of his sports journalism can be found on college basketball websites that don’t exist anymore (PhilaHoops Heads rise up…)