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The Phillies Need to Start Hitting and Winning So We Can Enjoy these Nick Castellanos Quotes

Kyle Pagan

By Kyle Pagan

Published:

Until Nick Castellanos becomes a hitting machine again, we’re going to have to deal with him as a quote machine , and he didn’t disappoint in this spot with Mero:

YouTube video

“If you want to be happy for a lifetime, win a championship with your brothers.”

Imagine if the Phils got off to a 12-4 start. This quote would hit like a Bryce Harper dead center bomb:

Instead it’s just a slow-roller to the shortstop for another double play.

If the Phillies start winning, we can start enjoying the stuff they bring off the field. Castey is easily the best quote on the team (Happy People Hit Better shirts now on sale). He’s someone you’d want to have a beer or smoke a joint with, or if you’re Kyle Schwarber go to a psychedelic art installation with. But nobody wants to watch a Corona spot when you’re batting .190 and can’t figure out right field because of the new scoreboard. Doesn’t matter how cool you seem off the field or grateful for your Cuban-born relatives to get you this opportunity. We don’t care about your arts and crafts and finger paintings with a Yankees fan. We want you to hit with RISP and play flawless outfield. Especially when you’re making $25 million to do so. The happy-go-lucky shit loses it’s luster pretty quick. Hopefully this past weekend, where he hit .250 and knocked in the game-winning run turns some things around because I want to listen to this guy spouting off existential things like how everyone is art:

Kyle Pagan
Kyle Pagan

Kyle writes blog posts and does Man on the Street-style videos all around Philadelphia. He graduated from Temple University (a basketball school) in 2015. contact: k.pagan@sportradar.com

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