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Your Monday Morning Roundup

Kyle Scott

By Kyle Scott

Published:

OK so this is apparently a topic today:

John Bolaris doesn’t know why:

But I’m not even sure what the debate is here. Forget about the practice attendance. It’s not like the stadium was filled for the first open practice last year:

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In fact, it was less full:

Throw in the rain and thunderstorms in the forecast yesterday, the fact that the most exciting player on the team won’t dress for games, and the Doug Pederson factor, and you have all the answer you need as to why attendance wasn’t better.

Still, interest is down in the Eagles. How could it not be? Regardless of how much you’ve talked yourself into him, the fact is that Doug Pederson is the least exciting, or at least the least interesting, coaching hire possible. He’s here to take over a mediocre team that improved on defense but comes into the season with an uncomfortable quarterback situation, a very scary running back situation, more of the same elsewhere on offense, and no marquee players of which to name. And consider the fact that the Eagles have the most 1 p.m. games in the NFC East (so do the Redskins), with 10– the Giants and Cowboys have 8 and 5, respectively.

So of course interest is down. But an open practice proves nothing. No team gets a big turnout… for… ah… these… um… things:

Shit.

Let’s hit it!

 

But first, a word from our sponsors:

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Bang. Still selling. Get one.

More. Already have all of our shirts? Check out Philly Phaithful.

Amazon. You’re going to shop there anyway, use our link and support your favorite website.

 

The roundup:

Doug Pederson explained what the Eagles are working on with Carson Wentz:

“Specifically trying to keep his feet tighter to the ground,” said Pederson. “He can get a little jumpy, a little hoppy. He can also be a little upright in his frame, so try to keep him in a bent posture a little bit, and then just his knowledge and understanding of the offense, being able to anticipate and become an accurate — a little more accurate passer. He can work on those things with drill work and just the more reps he gets, he’ll be more comfortable with those. There are just a couple things we’re doing with him.”

 

Worth noting:

And here are just about all of them:

YouTube video

 

https://twitter.com/GarryCobb/status/759375191407550464

Bold choice here by C Gobb to hawk his appearance at – if I’m hearing him right – Better Clean Laundry in the Northeast, which is apparently a new, great(?) laundromat owned by former Eagle(?) James Betterson, who played in 23 total games for the Eagles in the 1970s. His laundromat, which has a distinct Gustavo Fring element to it, is using unabashed, un-licensed(?) Eagles imagery to appeal to the lowest common denominator of people who would choose to wash their clothes at a place because they met G Cobb there. Fuck I hate this city sometimes.

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And yep, pretty sure I just gave them free advertising.

 

The Donald Trump campaign is delightfully disturbing:

YouTube video

https://twitter.com/SopanDeb/status/759988751502307329

 

Draymond Green snapchatted a picture of his dick, which he promptly deleted from his story and then claimed he was hacked before eventually admitting to it (the dick pic trifecta!). It’s available on Twitter if you want to see it. I’m not sure why anyone with a penis that ugly would want to send it out there. I mean, sure, you can see only the tip and a little more, and presumably, given Draymond’s physical appearance, there’s 70 feet of length off-camera, but still, that is the saddest, driest-looking penis this side of an eskimo who forgot his pants. I’m disappointed, actually.

 

The MLB trade deadline is today and I’m still miffed that the Phillies are or were considering trading Vince Velasquez. The only possible explanation is that he is a walking injury concern, something that one Astros exec was a bit too eager to point out to Jayson Stark when Velasquez got hurt earlier this season. And though there are real concerns about his long-term suitability as a top starter, to me trading Velasquez would be a very Hinkie move on the part of the Phillies– an essential kicking of the can down the road but in a sport where it is much more difficult to gauge the worth of prospects and or picks received in return. It likely won’t happen, but I’m surprised that it’s even a discussion.

 

Elvis Andrus scaring Michael Young with a clown mask on his Rangers Hall of Fame induction night is the funniest thing you’ll see online today:

YouTube video

 

John Sterling is a jerkoff.

 

Bubba Watson’s caddie put a fan in his place.

 

Apropos of nothing but never gets old and the same thing I recited to myself as Nantz was readying to call Jimmy Walker’s winning putt at the PGA Championship yesterday:

 

Holy boner:

 

Today in Ryan Lochte, Douchebag:

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That’s his actual hairstyle for the Olympics.

 

I feel like CBS’ “How Does it Feel” index is just taunting us:

 

Your 2016 Philadelphia Phillies:

 

With overcrowded cars, inconvenient schedules, and shorter trains, SEPTA could write off the occasional free ride as a tax for people having to put up with their problems. That’s not how they see it.

 

Johnny Manziel has decided that he wants to play for the Cowboys. In related news, I’ve decided I’m marrying Maria Menounos (Jim). That’s definitely how both of those things work.

 

Podcast:

Crossing Streams with John Gonzalez:

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The Stepover Episode 2 discussing idiot media members:

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Kyle Scott
Kyle Scott

Kyle Scott is the founder and editor of CrossingBroad.com. He has written for CBS Philly and Philly Voice, and been a panelist or contributor on NBC Sports Philly, FOX 29 and SNY TV, as well as a recurring guest on 97.5 The Fanatic, 94 WIP, 106.7 The Fan and other stations. He has more than 10 years experience running digital media properties and in online advertising and marketing.

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