There were reports earlier this week that Chip Kelly, packing up to leave for USC, bought a house in New Jersey. Indeed he did.

According to numerous tipsters – but only one who gets the t-shirt for providing concrete info – Chip bought a house in Haddonfield, New Jersey. I won’t post the address or link to it, but here are details from the listing:

[I’ve removed the pictures because numbskulls were reverse Google Image searching them for address]

  • $1.1 million
  • Built in the 1940s
  • Over 4,500 square feet
  • Three-quarters of an acre
  • Indoor pool
  • Movie theater

It’s, uh, old-fashioned. Kind of surprising for Chip. He’s gonna need to do some modernizing to get his sleep pattern readouts projected onto his smart wall above the basement smoothie bar which automatically concocts your drink based on your beat-specific music selections initiated by holding up cards with cartoon characters on them read by highly calibrated monitors that detect both movement and oxygen level… next to his laundry room.

But here’s the kicker… well, the quarterback. Kelly is just seven – SEVEN! – houses away from Sam Bradford, who according to tipsters is renting from renter-to-the-athletes Chris Pronger (less certain of this detail about renting from Pronger, however). [UPDATE: Some are indicating that Jason Smith owns the house and that Pronger rented from him.]

So, not only did Chip just purchase (transaction complete) a $1.1 million home – a near fixer-upper at that price – but he can literally morning (v.) with Bradford. You want to end your coaching and quarterback controversies in one fell Bradley-Cooper-Swoop? Buy a house in New Jersey next to your much maligned quarterback.