News

Crossing Broad Stands in Solidarity with Cecily Tynan and the Much-Maligned Meteorological Community

By Kevin Kinkead

Published: Jan 3rd, 2024 · 11:07 AM EST

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It’s a tradition unlike any other, Philadelphia meteorologists defending themselves on social media:

I think it’s rich that, nearly 4 days before winter storm, I’m being criticized for not releasing a snowfall map yet. We NEVER issue a map this far in advance, especially when the system is still out over the Pacific Ocean. Being accurate is more important than being first! https://t.co/JfwlF0rqXS

— Cecily Tynan (@CecilyTynan) January 3, 2024

In case you’re living under a rock and unaware, there is snow in the forecast for this weekend. A “potential winter storm,” according to my phone. Chance of snow: 80%. You know it’s a good one because John Bolaris is tweeting in capital letters. “UPDATING NOR’EASTER AND WHAT IT MEANS FOR THE NORTHEAST AFTER NOON MODEL RUNS RE-TWEET FOR MY LOYAL X FOLLOWERS,” he said on Wednesday morning.

Now you may be surprised to know that weather forecasting is an inexact science. Wow! That’s crazy! The meteorologists look at the computer models and analyze the data and craft their forecasts based on the available information. The sports equivalent would be handing out draft grades when none of these guys have played a single fucking NFL game. In this parallel, Jalen Reagor is the “Storm of the Century.”

That’s why this amuses me, because meteorology and sports media are both non-linear disciplines. Nothing is a straight path. Nolan Smith might be a good player or he might stink. I guess we’ll have to watch the games and see what happens! If you’re looking for something linear, try being a painter. You paint the wall and then it’s painted. The end!

Howard Eskin regularly accuses meteorologists of being “clueless,” when he himself throws more shit at the wall than anyone. As a recent example, note that Howard was “hearing” that the Phillies wouldn’t re-sign Aaron Nola, who ended up receiving $172 million over seven years. What a dope! At least the meteorologists are actually looking at models when they tell everybody what they think is going to happen.

We are a neutral blog on most occasions, fair and balanced and all of that. But in this case, I am going to break from protocol and declare a side. We stand unequivocally with the meteorologists and support their eternal struggle against all of the nitwits, dopes, and morons out there.

The storm isn’t even over the lower 48 yet. Modeling can be very inaccurate when the storm is still out over the Pacific. We NEVER issue a snow map nearly four days in advance of a storm. We will have more details tomorrow. Learn some patience, and manners, my friend.

— Cecily Tynan (@CecilyTynan) January 3, 2024