Eagles

Yep, Marcus Hayes was a Huge Asshole on Philly Sports Talk Last Night

By Kyle Scott

Published: Sep 6th, 2013 · 10:16 AM EDT

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In what had to be one of the most ill-conceived segments imaginable, huge asshole Marcus Hayes finally weighed in on the Riley Cooper matter by way of a HOT SPORTS TAKE on Philly Sports Talk last night.

In one corner was known blowhard Hayes, there to give what was obviously going to be the anti-white guyRiley take. In the other, Eagles pitchman Dave Spadaro, who, in his pastel shirt and gold tie looked like one of those (awesome) multiple-color crayons from when you were little, there to give the SUN IS SHINING AND THERE ARE ROSES IN THE GRASS WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY TO TELL YOU HOW GREAT THINGS ARE take.

What could go wrong?!

Why you would put walking press release Spadaro on TV to act as an impartial observer on anything Eagles, let alone a race controversy, is beyond me. But pitting him against Hayes, who hates everybody, is doubly worse, or, depending on your perspective, an awesome train wreck of TV that you couldn’t look away from!

Poor Amy Fadool was forced to moderate this unfortunate panel, serving as the voice of reason between two agenda-spewing cartoons.

Let’s sample the discourse:

Spadaro: “I’m ready for football. Two players who clearly got mixed up in a practice session and tempers flared. I’ve seen it 1,000 times over the years.”

Nothing to see here! Saddam is still alive and in control!

Spadaro: “It is two players going at it in practice. If there was situations that didn’t exist previously, what Riley’s gone through and what Cary’s been like since we’ve gotten to know him, it wouldn’t be a big deal at all.”

But, those situations do exist. And what “Riley’s gone through” was his own doing. And Cary Williams has been a dickhead. Continue, please.

Hayes: “If you look at what happened [in the fight], Riley Cooper was the aggressor after the play was over and Cary Williams probably took exception to… a pretty physical play for having shoulder pads and shorts.”

“Cary Williams probably reacted to Riley Cooper. Riley Cooper went after Cary Williams. He popped up and he probably didn’t like being defended that hard. Riley Cooper also has to understand, he has no leash. That’s over, that’s gone for him. He’s going to be targeted.”

Not so fast, Marc. Cooper did engage Williams… who then proceeded to throw punches into Cooper’s helmet. Cooper walked away and Williams kept chasing him, yelling, “I’m not a nigger you fuck with.”

Williams was in the wrong in this situation. A minor disturbance turned into a major kerfuffle because Williams has a fuse shorter than an Acme bomb.

But just keep blaming the white guy.

Hayes: “He’s is a marked man. And he has to do it cleaner and sharper than everybody else. And he’s gonna go after probably the least wise guy to go after on the team? He’s got to be more mature than that, he’s got to be smarter than that. He has no leash, but he doesn’t operate like it, you know? He operates as if nothing ever happened. Well, something happened.”

Spadaro: “But understand, that Riley Cooper, the kind of football player he is, Marcus, he’s always been a physical player.”

Hayes: “He has to change.”

Spadaro: “Well, that’s not going to change.”

Hayes: “At practice he has to change.”

Spadaro: “Being a physical player is not going to change.”

Hayes: “At practice he has to change.”

Repeating himself an argumentation crutch for Hayes.

And how, in the fuck-wind, does he know how Cooper operates? We’ve heard exactly nothing from him since he returned to the team. There was about a four-second window yesterday when he reacted to his jackass teammate. Let’s just keep blowing hot air anyway.

Spadaro: “It’s a football play. I’m glad we’re taking about football.”

Hayes: “We’re not talking about football at all. Riley Cooper is no longer a football player, he’s a symbol for something that’s terrible, and the Eagles chose to keep him on the roster, so they have to deal with it every iteration all year long.”

– checks Eagles roster – Nope, still a football player…

 … though Kurt Coleman’s designation as such is up for debate.

Fadool: “Marcus, has this team moved on from that?”

Hayes: “There are players on this team who clearly haven’t moved on from that. I believe Cary Williams to be one of them. I believe LeSean McCoy to be one of them. I wouldn’t be surprised if DeSean Jackson was one of them, mainly because those were the three guys who, after the incident was publicized, those were three guys who said it’s going to be a hard thing to get past. There is a level of professionalism that everyone has to assume, but there’s also a level of humanity that can’t be ignored. I mean, you’re talking about young men who believe themselves, I think, largely correctly, to be victims of a society that puts obstacles in front of them that aren’t in front of Riley Cooper.”

Spadaro: “Number one, Marcus, to kind of throw some names out there of players that you might not think are on board or have gotten past the situation, I’m not going to tell you that’s super responsible. You’re just throwing names out there.”

Crayola is right. And again, Hayes is used to just throwing names out there.

Hayes: “We’re talking about the people who we got tape from and players who said, at the beginning, as I said, at the beginning, would have trouble moving on from this. They may or may not. The question was…”

Spadaro: “The question was: “Has the team moved on?”

Hayes: “No, the question was: “Might there be players who haven’t moved on?” The answer was: “Yes, there might be.” And these are some of them.”

I’ll ask the court reporter to please re-read Mrs. Fadool’s question.

“Marcus, has this team moved on from that?”

And the response?

“There are players on this team who clearly haven’t moved on from that.”

Thank you.

After that, Hayes just rolled his eyes and sighed, as he’s been known to do.

Video after the jump.