Photo of The Bear via reader Kyle
If there was ever an example of large, non-athlete masses imitating the misery that is Philly sports… it would be the time Smarty Jones lost the Triple Crown. But if there was another… it would be today’s Wing Bowl-related developments: A New Englander called The Bear won Philly’s own event, edging out local favorite Super Squibb in front of 22,000 drunk and partially naked Philadelphians while news broke that the city’s avian-eating hero, El Wingador, a former truck driver from New Jersey, was indicted on cocaine charges.
It’s always sunny here.
Five-time Wing Bowl champion Bill “El Wingador” Simmons was indicted this week on cocaine distribution charges filed in June.
Simmons, 51, is charged with four counts of possession of a controlled dangerous substance (CDS) and one count of manufacturing or distribution of more than a half ounce of cocaine.
He’s also charged with six counts of manufacturing or distribution of more than a half ounce and less than five ounces of the drug and two counts of manufacturing less than half an ounce.
News of Simmons’ arrest first broke in June, so none of this is a surprise, and it’s probably not a coincidence that his indictment was announced, literally, just as Wing Bowl 21 was beginning. Love you, Philadelphia things.