Your Monday Morning Roundup: No-Hit It And Quit It Edition
Photo credit: Caylor Arnold-USA TODAY Sports
That was, without exaggeration, the first time I got genuinely excited about a Philly sporting event in 2015. It feels nice to like sports again.
Full disclosure: I didn’t hate Tom McCarthy’s call of the final out. Actually thought it was on-par with Scott Franzke’s. But. Of course there’s a but. But, I could’ve done without him calling Wrigley Field “a building” moments after… comparing Hamels to a cucumber (“as cool as a cucumber on a 94 degree day”)… and his constant efforts to set up the call before each of the final three or so pitches. T-Mac in the moments after was about as natural as Vince Vaughn and Kelly Reilly at the fertility clinic in Episode 3 of True Detective. Just nothing about it felt authentic– from the obvious line-reading, to the forced orgasm, to the viewer’s constant wondering why they chose him to perform such an important job.
Let’s hit it!
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The roundup:
Final out, from the stands.
Just a sampling of the congratulatory Tweets:
None better than Doc’s, though:
Just in case it wasn’t obvious:
The most important prop in Cole Hamels’ no-hitter? Sunglasses. Carlos Ruiz ditched his to better deal with the shadows in the bottom of the ninth, and Odubel Herrera almost forgot his going into the bottom of the eighth. “Herrera was missing his sunglasses, which had been placed in a different-than-usual spot in the dugout,” says Jake Kaplan. “Infielder Andres Blanco noticed and called out to Herrera. The batboy made a special delivery, causing a brief delay before Hamels began his penultimate inning.” That still doesn’t explain him flopping around like Mr. Bean on that last out though.
Chicago media is already CLAMORING for Hamels. Paul Sullivan of the Chicago Tribune:
Whether Phillies general manager Ruben Amaro can trade someone as popular as Hamels coming off a no-hitter remains to be seen. But Hamels’ already high trade value definitely rose a notch.
“I’d be surprised if Ruben’s phone isn’t off the hook right now,” Mackanin said.
Good thing Theo Epstein has speed-dial.
Fully convinced that Amaro will screw this up.
The Windy City almost cost Cole that no-no. Odubel Herrera:
“I saw the contact of the ball,” Herrera said through his translator and teammate Andres Blanco. “I thought that the ball would either go over or hit the wall, and I wanted to be able to jump or climb or whatever I needed to do to catch it. I didn’t expect the wind to stop the ball the way it did. I didn’t slide. I just dived to catch the ball.”
Cole Hamels was so dominant on Saturday– he no-hit Chicago’s football team!
pic via (@NicBeardsly311)
Tough week for this Twitter account:
Carlos Ruiz has tied Jason Varitek for the most caught no-hitters, with four.
Rhodes Scholar Barrett Brooks says he predicted… what… that Cole Hamels’ trade value would rise after throwing a DEADLINE NO-HITTER?
Way to step out on that limb there, B-man.
The Cole Hamels potential career-ending montage WIP played this morning is great.
A common denominator in Chip Kelly’s releases? Drew Rosenhaus.
Tough weekend for Billy Burns [video]:
Need more Rob Lowe. Bad Comedian Eli Manning and Arts and Craftsy Tony Romo aren’t cutting it. Two things: 1) I imagine that if Sam Bradford had a commercial, it’d include Sam Bradford and One-Legged Sam Bradford… twist: they might be the same person! 2) I feel like DirectTV is going to jam these spots down our throats all season long.
Mets fans set up a GoFunMe page for a new hitter.
Astronaut Scott checks in from FUCKING SPACE:
Of course, this could also serve as a rough guide of the area that will be off-limits during the Pope’s visit #popevisit.
The bow tie man himself, Honey I Shrunk the Kenny, reports that the Dodgers might could maybe possibly there’s some chance be open to trading Yasiel Puig.
I love Chip, but I almost thought this quote, relayed by Jimmy Kempski, about him being so private was satire:
Alright, Chipper– let’s settle down just a bit on the lofty rhetoric.
Jason Peters is the top-rated left tackle in Madden 16.
Baseball’s trade deadline week has begun, and the Cole Hamels rumors are swirling. According to Jayson Stark, “the Chicago Cubs, New York Yankees, San Francisco Giants and Boston Red Sox” are all in the running for Hamels, but the Dodgers and Rangers are most likely to land him. Sources told Stark the deal won’t likely happen during the first half of the week.
The Rangers reportedly see Hamels as a long-term member of a dynamic duo:
And Ken Rosenthal’s sources are saying pretty much the same thing as Stark’s. “Momentum clearly is building toward a trade,” baby bowtie said. “Some teams involved in the bidding believe that the Rangers are the front-runner; the Phillies like the Rangers’ prospects perhaps better than any other team’s.” Lil’ Rosie agrees that the Dodgers are a close second.
Wheels is a bit weird, or lazy: “[Renee] Gosik and [Chris] Wheeler met in 1990 when she was a Phillies usher, and he asked her out. They’re both Penn State alums, and in their basement they keep a Christmas tree year-round with Nittany Lions ornaments. Their 12-year-old Shih Tzu is named Nittany.” WAIT A MINUTE, CHRIS WHEELER HAS A GIRLFRIEND? CHIP KELLY WAS MARRIED FOR SEVEN (!!!!!!!!!) YEARS? WHAT’S NEXT, CHARLIE MANUEL GOT HITCHED IN VEGAS OVER THE WEEKEND?
OH COME ON!!!!
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