Category: Writer/Editor: Kyle Scott (page 1 of 930)

Chip Kelly Diving Head-First into an Inflatable Pool of Ice Water is the Best Thing You’ll See This Week

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The Eagles did the #IceBucketChallenge yesterday (I didn’t blog about it because my soul is slowly eroding from writing that hashtag). It was good. They all stood in an inflatable pool and howled like Judge Doom melting while four backhoes poured cold water on them (another sentence we’re going to look back on in 12 years with great wonder). What was left unseen, however, was Chip Kelly performing a fat man swan dive into the pool. Amazeballs.

The audio on this is one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard. I have no idea what he’s saying and it’s still brilliant.

via (@dhm), H/T to (@JohnnyFromPhilly), full video here

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Mo’ne Davis Autographs Are Going for $500 on Ebay

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This is about where I’d sing Lee Greenwood’s God Bless The USA, because right now, a Mo’ne Davis signed Little League baseball is going for (with 12 hours remaining) $510!

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The listing even comes complete with a horribly-lit picture of Mo’ne (allegedly) signing the ball:

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A few things:

1) Assuming this thing is real, I must say, I love Mo’ne’s signature. When I was 31 13, I used to practice my autograph in a black and white composition notebook, trying out all sorts of crazy, swirly designs just in case I ever became a famous athlete. God help the world if I had. I would’ve been such a prick with an obnoxious autograph to match it. But not Mo’ne. Like everything else she does, she’s just a kid, signing shit with bad handwriting like she’s writing her name on the attendance slip for science class.

2) Mo’ne. If this doesn’t solidify her reaching one-name status, I don’t know what does.

3) Don’t pay $510 for this. I’m not an autograph guy, so I’d probably only pay $500 for signatures from, in this order: Babe Ruth, Steve Jobs, John Hancock and Jesus (and his would require a verifying face-stamp). But if you really want Mo’ne’s signature, just hire a kid to steal her spelling homework or something. Don’t buy this.

Anyway, weird times right now. In 12 years, we’re going to look back on 2014 as the year a 13-year-old girl was the most famous athlete, people dumped water on their heads, cops terrorized citizens in Missouri, and the 777 magic trick began.

H/T to (@EFQZ)

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The Eagles Announced New Food Offerings at The Linc Yesterday, and Yep, There’s a Former Player BBQ

Photo: Eagles

Photo: Eagles

Yesterday, Aramark and the Eagles announced a whole new lineup of concession food stuffs that Aramark can ruin. Joining the already available Tony Luke’s Cheesesteaks, Chickie’s and Pete’s Crab Fries, McNally’s The Schmitter, and other familiar fare, Aramark is adding [via CBS Philly]:

To the concourses

Dunkin’ Donuts and Rita’s Italian Ice will now be available in general concessions. Dunkin’ Donuts will now offer their signature coffees, iced coffees and hot chocolate in sections 104, 117, 136, 123, 224, 203, CS20, CS37, while Rita’s will offer a variety of popular flavors.

To the Club Level Market

  • NEW! Marc Vetri’s ‘Pizzeria Vetri,’ serving fresh-made artisan pizza, fired in a Brick oven. Options include Margherita Taglio, Salsiccia Taglio and Rotolo.
  • Chef Peter McAndrews’ Paseano’s offers made to order culinary favorites, like The Paesano and Chicken Diavlo.
  • A selection of Grab-n- Go menu items  freshly  prepared to be quick and healthy
  • Exclusive Liberty Bell Brewing Co., offering a variety of  craft beers and seasonal brews, popular domestic beers and wine on tap, a more eco-friendly way to serve wine.

And the headliner

Eagles Legends Mike Quick and Harold Carmichael were two of the best players in franchise history, and now they’re sharing their hunger for the game with ‘Quick & Carmichael BBQ,’ featuring their vision of the perfect barbecue sandwich. Here, fans can choose between The Quick (black cherry smoked pulled pork with house made slaw on a potato roll) or The Carmichael (maple sugar smoked pulled chicken with house made slaw on a potato roll), or if they don’t want to play favorites, a combination of the two, The Quick & Carmichael (black cherry smoked pulled pork, maple sugar smoked pulled chicken, topped with house made slaw, on a potato roll). Each sandwich is available with choice of Kansas City Style Barbecue Sauce or Carolina Vinegar Barbecue Sauce.

Located at the Tork Café in the SCA Club and Market in the Panasonic Club. The sandwiches are also available in concessions behind section 134

Why is it that former athletes always get BBQ sandwiches and pits? Nothing against a fantastic pulled pork sandwich, but isn’t there any other food item former athletes are passionate about? What might the concessional choices of the current Eagles look like in a few years? Some ideas:

 

LeSean McCoy: Sliders.

Nick Foles: Eh, just a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Nothing fancy.

Riley Cooper: White-meat turkey with mayonnaise served on white bread with a side of white corn.

Jason Kelce: A burger and two shots.

Lane Johnson: The 17 Grand Steak.

Connor Barwin: Poached duck in a red wine reduction served atop a bed of baby arugula, upgradable to a combo with a side of pommes frites and a craft beer.

Alex Henery: Short ribs.

Chip Kelly: Jimmy John’s.

Jeremy Maclin: Pulled pork… ligaments.

Mark Sanchez: Butt Roast.

Darren Sproles: Salt– can be used on any of the other dishes mentioned.

Trent Cole: Venison.

Cary Williams: A live animal that you talk shit to before eating. And scones.

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The Soon-to-be-closed Revel Hemorraghed Money in the Most Hilarious Way Possible

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Oh, the Revel. The pricey, overtly-grand, poor customer-serviced, market-deaf casino never caught on and, after being forced to declare bankruptcy for a second time this summer, announced that it will close its doors next month. But it’s not often that a business which has lost investors comically large bags of cash actually loses comically large bags of cash.

From the Press of Atlantic City:

Earlier this month, more than $20,000 was lost when an armored car company picked up money from the Atlantic City casino — and left one of the bags on the roof.

Now, an investigation is underway to find out what happened to the money.

Hours after GardaWorld armored car services made a cash pickup at Revel on Aug. 6, the casino was notified that nearly $21,000 in currency was missing, according to an incident report obtained by The Press of Atlantic City. The report does not indicate the total amount of the full transaction.

I’d start by checking the SWAT team…

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The Sixers’ New Mascot Is Likely Coming This Fall

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Ridiculously photogenic Ben Davis lookalike Devils and Sixers CEO Scott O’Neil spoke with the Philadelphia Business Journal about the business aspects of running a team that, at the moment, is actively trying to be the worst in professional sports. He didn’t say anything too Earth-shattering, but he did reveal that a new mascot is currently being tested by focus groups of small children:

PBJ: Will the team finally have a new mascot this year?

O’Neil: It looks like we will. That’s in development right now. We have kids coming in as part of focus groups to help with the design and the name. We’re looking at a November or December launch.

Guessing the market research is almost complete, what with summer vacation drawing to an end and all.

O’Neil also talked about two additional big-time sponsorships the Sixers are working on:

PBJ: And sponsorship deals?

O’Neil: The corporate support is there. We are involved in three of the biggest sponsorship deals in the franchise’s history. [The first of which with PartyPoker.com was activated last season ]. Two haven’t been finalized yet, but they are coming.

You can’t help but wonder if, like the Party Poker deal, these are hybrid deals involving the Sixers and their sister team, the New Jersey Devils. This sort of thing makes my mouth taste bad, but I’d be lying if I said Harris and his pragmatic approach wasn’t growing on me. I may have been wrong about him.

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Mo’ne Davis Is on the Cover of Sports Illustrated

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Well, it’s been fun, Taney.

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Zion Spearman’s Nickname Is Almost Cooler than His Name

Photo credit: Evan Habeeb-USA TODAY Sports

Photo credit: Evan Habeeb-USA TODAY Sports

Mo’ne is, rightfully, getting most of the attention at the Little League World Series, but her teammates deserve some love, too. Jared Sprague-Lott is a stud, Kai Cummings speaks better than most professional athletes*, and Erik Lipson never stops grinning in much the same way that neighborhood kid who used to always whoop you on the Power Pad never stopped grinning. And then there’s masher ZION SPEARMAN, who goes by the nickname “The Preacher.”

Sarah Baicker wrote about him today:

The player nicknamed “The Preacher” has improved dramatically even over the past year, his coaches say. The reason, Spearman noted, is the intense effort he’s put into three areas of his game.

“My mechanics, my fielding and my batting,” he said.

Rice can’t underscore enough just how hard Spearman has worked to improve himself. Comparing him physically to a “mini Bo Jackson,” the manager said Spearman is a regular at Philly’s batting cages, doing all he can to perfect his form and make complete use of his 168-pound frame.

I weigh exactly 168 pounds, too, so either he’s way strong for his age or I’m a noodle. Whatever. Anyway, why The Preacher?

As for that nickname, “The Preacher?”

“He does our team prayer before we go out,” Rice said. “It’s not like a gospel thing where he gets into it, but it’s a very beautiful little prayer he says for us.

“And so far, it’s worked.”

Keep prechin’, ZION. Keep preachin’.

*Actual thing Kai said after the game the other night: “I was reading something that said luck is a combination of opportunity meeting preparation. So I think we prepared hard enough and we had the opportunity to get where we are.” Whoa.

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New York Magazine Calls Mo’ne Davis a “National Treasure”

Photo credit: Evan Habeeb-USA TODAY Sports

Photo credit: Evan Habeeb-USA TODAY Sports

Allison Davis, writing for New York Magazine:

Reading about race relations in America is the most depressing experience you could embark upon this month. Thankfully, here’s this black teenage girl not just dominating at the most American of America’s pastimes, but winning everyone over, making headlines, and negotiating appearances on late-night talk shows. Her interviews, in which she considers what it means to be a superstar and role model at the age of 13 and her own potential as a future baseball star (or, frankly, whatever she wants), are a much-needed antidote to otherwise bleak headlines about what it means to be black in America right now.

But still, Davis: You should probably ignore people like me who are trying to hang way too much symbolism on your shoulders and just play ball. We’re all really glad you exist.

Well, that MAN CHILD on Las Vegas may not be really glad she exists, but yeah, Mo’ne is probably the coolest, most postive thing going on in America right now.

From a local standpoint, Mo’ne and the Dragons are the Philly story. Girl against boys is Rocky, it’s Allen Iverson, it’s the ’93 Phils. Philly loves talented, unconventional underdogs. A 13-year-old girl throwing two complete game shutouts on national TV, with a chance at another against powerhouse Las Vegas coming tomorrow night, is straight out of the Win Philly Over, and in a Hurry script. 2) Las Vegas is the perfect villain. They’ve scored 54 runs in their last six games. They have players with names like Payton, Josiah, Dillon, Dallan, Zach with a ch, and Austin. It’s as if the 2003 book of top baby names exploded onto their roster. With their formation, White America has completely outdone itself. They’re basically the D2 Iceland of the Little League World Series:

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Philly is a diverse group of city kids whose best player is a girl. All they’re missing is Emilio Estevez and an invasive Hendricks sponsorship. Dragons fly together?

3) They’re in the late-summer, Phillies stink vacuum right now. There’s no competition. Win tomorrow night and I’m not sure this city is going to be able to handle itself. Philly does hysteria well, but not even Action News has enough reporters for the man-on-the-street segments that will be needed for this one. As a community, we’re gonna have to resort to YouTube bar gamewatch celebration videos to satisfy our euphoric needs, because we can’t have Don Tollefson on our screens anymore screaming, “IT’S FOR THE CHILDREN!”

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