Tag: adam (page 1 of 4)

These are Some Reasons Why Adam Aron was Fired

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I wrote this post back in March, after Adam Aron went on a strange media tour in which he explained why the Sixers were so bad. I detailed the many reasons why I thought he was doing a terrible job as CEO, and as it turns out, I’m a goddamned soothsayer. So, given the news that he’s been fired, I figured, “Hey, why expend any energy when I can just use an old post, change the title and call it a day?” That’s what I’m doing. These are the reasons why I think Aron will now be looking for a distressed cruise line (perhaps this one?) to steer back to a prosperous port.

 

I’ve had enough.

Adam Aron keeps saying that he views fans as unpaid management consultants, thousands of passionate followers that give solicited and unsolicited opinions on each decision made by the newish Sixers ownership group. So, knowing that, consider this post free advice to Aron. Consultant’s fee waived.

Aron went on a mini media tour yesterday, first speaking with John Gonzalez at CSN Philly and then to an in-studio visit with Mike Missanelli at 97.5 The Fanatic, where he took calls from exactly the type of enraged hardos that would wait on hold for an hour to yell at an owner.

For Aron, it took balls. I’ll say that much.

I think it was somewhat overkill– the Sixers are in the midst of a losing season, but they didn’t sacrifice a small child in front of their 12,000 fans. A Rock Center-style sit-down with a charged up Gonzo and an hour and 20-minute-plus in-studio appearance with Missanelli felt like a bit much at this juncture. But, I’ll give Aron credit for taking the lumps, like he always does. He attached his face to the franchise, and he’s not backing down now that the going has gotten tough. Then again, Aron is a millionaire businessman who made a name for himself managing distressed entertainment properties back to health, so tough is a relative word here.

What we’ve seen in the year and a half since Aron, majority owner Joshua Harris and their nasally drones* have taken over the team is a series of alarming and somewhat offensive missteps that make you wonder if they nose know what they’re doing.

*Is it just me or do the Sixers have the second most nasally ownership (hello, Mark Cuban) in the NBA? Can’t they get an Afrin sponsorship or something? Hell, their mascot could even be a big nose that sneezes when the Sixers make a three. 

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I’ve spent quite a bit of time on these missteps on the site, so I’ll just touch on some of Aron’s accomplishments since taking over the team, with links for further reading:

Mascots. A moose, a dogg and Jerry Sandusky. These were the options Jim Henson’s Creature Shop came back with and that the Sixers, in turn, released to the public. That was more than a year ago, and the Sixers are still without a mascot.

Confetti. Perhaps the most noticeable in-game enhancement has been the confetti that ejaculates itself after each home win. Because the Sixers are a circus act. Or because it worked on a cruise line that Aron oversaw.

PA announcer. The Sixers get a da fuck? rating here. They turned Matt Cord into the website video interview guy (a role filled by interns at most professional sports organizations) and brought back 842-year-old Tom Lamaine to liven things up at the Well. A year later, they canned Lamaine, held an audition SO YOU CAN BE THE NEXT SIXERS PA ANNOUNCER (!!!)… and then went with Cord all over again. Fans are mad about many things, but I think this is the thing that should be investigated for false advertising. First off, who the hell makes a seasoned pro like Cord compete against jacklefucks to win back his old job? Second, DON’T DANGLE A STICK IN FRONT OF JACKLEFUCKS FOR YOUR OWN BENEFIT! The jacklefuck don’t like that. Did any of the auditioners ever really have a chance, or was this just some ruse by the Sixers to make it seem like you, the fan, could be part of the product? Because if it was the latter, I’d suggest holding an open audition to be the team’s center. Surely there is someone in Philadelphia who can pull down more than one rebound per game at the NBA level.

Ayla Brown. She’s pretty. Great pipes. Good singer, too. But she’s a former American Idol contestant from Boston whose father, Scott Brown, was (at the time of her hire) a Massachusetts Senator. Never mind that Harris’ company owns the rights to 19 Entertainment and American Idol, one Boston website lays out a great case that the reason Brown got the anthemeist gig with the Sixers was because, at the time, Harris needed support from then-Senator Brown to pave the way for a casino project that one of his companies, Caesars Entertainment, was bidding for in Boston. [Brown is out of office, but it sounds like Caesars is still in the running].

Cannon. The Sixers most productive offseason acquisition has been a giant cannon that shoots hundreds of t-shirts per minute.

image from mobilwi.typepad.com

Even P.T. Barnum is impressed with the absurdity of that list. Confetti, cannons, probably rigged contests? At what point will there be a bunch of near cross-dressers injecting artificial enthusiasm?

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Ah shit.

Now let’s turn our attention to some select comments made by Aron yesterday, because my BS meter is having a mild freakout.

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Passionate, Intense… What the F$%k?: Sixers Send Strange Season Ticket Renewal Email

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Why am I not surprised that a guy who was an executive in the travel and leisure industry for so long fails egregiously to understand the Philly sports fan?

Yesterday, the Sixers sent a season ticket renewal email (and brochure!), signed by Adam Aron, to members of the Franklin Club, the hokily-named club for the poor souls who wasted their hard-earned money on bullshit this season. You can find a lot of things wrong with the letter, but mostly, it’s just too long and rambly, like a drunken note to a scorned lover. No way should things like this ever approach 853 words. Never. Not ever. But if it wasn’t so damn offensive and silly, no one would have noticed.

You can read the entire thing after the jump (it has to be the third-longest letter to season ticket holders in NBA history). But here are a few passages that really popped:

When I think back to how this current season started, we all had such high hopes that this would be a year in which the Sixers would soar to new heights. Right out of the box, a new ownership group demonstrated its commitment to restoring the Sixers to glory, through its sole focus both on your team and the experience you receive each game at the Wells Fargo Center. Last season’s improved play on the court, culminating in a dazzling playoff run, was complemented by enhancements to the show that surrounds the game itself. And then we created one new benefit after another for being a season ticket holder in the creation of the Franklin Club – as but three examples among many: you can dine in the Cadillac Grill; you can come to the games early and watch your favorite NBA players warm-up in private; and you were not alone in watching your Sixers play, as notable sports heroes and celebrities came to game after game.

 

Um, what?

If you’re from Philadelphia, or anywhere near it, you just rolled your eyes. Watching teams warm-up and notable sports heroes and celebrities??? Are you kidding me with that shit? You know where else you can find these things? EVERY PROFESSIONAL SPORTING EVENT, PRETTY MUCH EVER. Who are we talking about here, ex-Sixers and Terrence Howard? Really, tell me. Because this list isn’t doing it for me:

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the 76ers architected a trade that brought the Western Conference’s starting All Star Center last season to the Sixers roster.

 

Offensive. This is Philadelphia, where our baseball team is loaded with stars… where our hockey team is always among the most competitive and highest-spending in the league… and where our football team consistently has top-flight talent. Newsflash: YOUR TEAM SHOULD HAVE ALL-STARS. I’m soooo sick and tired of the Sixers talking about how they got the starting center of the Western Conference All-Star team. Imagine if the Eagles sent out a letter saying that, although it didn’t work out, they brought an AFC All-Pro cornerback to their roster. Just think about that for a moment.  

As a result, keen observers from near and far immediately began touting the Sixers as being among the NBA’s most competitive and contending teams. Unfortunately though, as we all know, sport can be cruel. Injuries have plagued the Sixers all year, and dashed our dreams for what might have been in the 2012-2013 season.

 

Tell me more, oh great fairy godmother! Did the villagers make it through the cold winter? Might I, too, one day be visited be a handsome prince?!

I’ve read goddamned children’s book that were less clichéd than the shit spewing from the Sixers front office.

We will either have on the floor the fruits of our trade from last summer, or instead we will have considerable cap space to participate in the free agency market.

 

Oh good! I have the utmost confidence in Tony DiLeo to make this work. 

It’s that time of year to continue your commitment to the Sixers, by renewing your Season Tickets for the 2013-2014 season. We have intentionally held pricing changes this season flat or modest for all Franklin Club Silver and Gold members. The vast majority of seats in the open lower and mezzanine bowls this year will have the same season ticket price or less than that of last year, and not a one will have a season ticket price increase averaging more than $2 per game (excluding the so-called “inside the dasher “ seats or suites/clubbox seats). And as a season ticket holder and Franklin Club Member, not only are you guaranteed to have the same great seat location for each and every game and a wide array of Franklin Club member benefits, but your season ticket holder price also assures you of a significant discount. Compared to buying an individual game ticket at face price for each game, you will enjoy a discount of at least 20% or more on average.

 

Too. Many. Words. And the Franklin Club is entirely too confusing. How many miles do I have to fly before I reach Gold status?

[click to enlarge]

Franklin

 

We want to see you in your seats at Sixers games next season. To thank you for renewing your season tickets, we will give you with our compliments a handsome Adidas 76ers warm-up jacket. As you would expect, these jackets are of fine Adidas quality (One free jacket will be awarded per renewing account, regardless of the number of seats renewed). 

 

SWELL, PAPA! My very own Adidas warm-up jacket with a compass in the stock and this thing with which tells time!!!! 

You better be careful, though– you don’t want to shoot your eye out. Actually… you might, when you read the full thing after the jump.

H/T to Chris

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Sixers Fans are Not Pleased with Adam Aron


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Tweets after the jump
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Adam Aron, Too, Wants More Ping Pong Balls

When I woke up this morning – by Hayley pawing at the sides of the bed 30 minutes earlier than usual, at 6:30, since she was alone for six hours last night while I filmed Great Sports Debate and hosted Jim Carrey quizzo and because it’s written in her DNA that she must play, pee or eat rabbit poop every three goddamn hours (!) – I thought to myself, “Self, what sort of mediocrity-celebrating Tweets will Adam Aron fire out into the ether today?” 

These, apparently:

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And from last night:

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He has to be the first team CEO or President, or coach or executive or anyone on the payroll to publicly acknowledge the desire to tank in order to get a higher draft pick. But I’m glad he’s rooting for the bottom to fall out stay out so the Sixers can, for the 20th year in a row, get some young talent. 

I can’t imagine David Stern agrees with me, however. A team’s CEO tweeting the difficulty of the remaining schedule to imply that hey, we’re gonna lose! doesn’t say much about the compete level. Then again, signing Nick Young and Kwame Brown already made that much apparent.

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Today is Not a Good Day to be Adam Aron

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A sampling of Tweets to Adam Aron upon today’s confirmation that Andrew Bynum is, in fact, an asshole. 

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Adam Aron Would Like to Take This Moment to Remind You How Mediocre His Basketball Team is

Sometimes you can Tweet too much. And I think that’s what Adam Aron is doing.

Exhibits A, B and C:

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D) So you're telling me things haven't changed?

Just moments after saying the Sixers “will continue to strive to build a winner,” Aron puts out a fan poll asking if his team will be a seventh or eighth seed, or miss the playoffs entirely? Cool.

Are these not the most Sixers Tweets ever? Hey, we may be awful, but don’t worry, the teams we trail by three and four and a half games in the standings lost last night, too! Sunshine! Do you think we’ll eek into the playoffs and get bounced in the first round?? Please RT.

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Adam Aron Said Fan Overpaid for Four-Cent Tickets

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Well, at least the Sixers are finally willing to admit that their tickets are essentially worthless.

Adam Aron hopped on* the WIP Morning Show today to defend his team’s attendance, ticket prices, play, injured stars and just about every other negative thing that could be said about a professional sports franchise. As always, he made his case with humor and candor, mostly. But. But I really can’t take the glass-half-full moral victory-isms that continuously come from the Sixers front office. Third most wins in NBA history. 15th most made three-pointers in NBA history. Seventh best in-arena popcorn in the Eastern Conference. 

And now, a new one: Sixth biggest attendance increase in the NBA.

Oh?

"Last year, as you know, the Sixers had the biggest attendance increase of all 30 teams in the NBA, year over year. And this year, we have the sixth biggest increase in attendance in the NBA, year over year."

 

I’ll buy it about last year. According to ESPN.com, the Sixers' 2011-2012 average attendance was 17,502, up from 14,751 in 2010-2011. But what was that about this season? Sixth biggest increase in the NBA? The Sixers’ 2012-2013 average attendance is 16,253, and that tells me – keep in mind, I was never very good at math – that the average attendance has actually decreased by 1,249, or 7%. 

Now, I know attendance numbers are tricky. They can be sliced a hundred different ways and spit out 200 additional ways. Is it paid attendance? Actual attendance? Tickets sold? Tickets given out? Paying customers plus the posses, pussies, papas and assorted hangers-on of NBA stars? It’s safe to assume that ESPN’s numbers reflect paid attendance, which means that the Sixers are selling – at whatever full or discounted price – 16,253 tickets per game. But, obviously, not all of those people are showing up, a claim evidenced by the story of the knucklehead who bought 18 tickets for under a dollar and used only two of them, leaving the rest of the purchased row empty. Aron knows that (I think…), even if this is what he had to say on that particular matter:

“First of all, the way we played in the third quarter against the Indiana Pacers Wednesday night, I think the guy overpaid for the seats. But that’s a different issue. You know, we did sell those tickets at full price. So why somebody… who bought those tickets from us, at full price, would turn around and resell them for four cents, is a ridiculous way to use his tickets. But it’s a free country and he’s allowed to do what he wants to do.” 

 

In case it’s not apparent: the reason people are selling their $10 tickets for less than pennies on the dollar (literally!) is because they were expecting a quality product, or an all-star center, or a team at or above .500. Instead, they’re getting confetti, Ayla Brown, and the occasional Big Mac. 

*On Twitter, celebs, athletes, writers, bloggers etc. always say that they’re “hopping on” the radio. Hell, I’ve done it. But here’s what that translates to: I want to sound really cool and nonchalant about my appearance, so I’ll just say I’m hopping on, like it ain’t no thing. “Just taking out the trash, getting my oil changed and hopping on the radio. How’s your Tuesday? Probably not as cool as mine.”

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Cecily Tynan (Lovingly) Called Adam Joseph a “Moron” on Action News

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Action News’ A-Team of Jim Gardner, Cecily Tynan and Adam Joseph went on the air just as our impending death came ashore in Sea Isle. The timing really couldn’t have worked out more perfectly for those guys and other local six o’clock news teams. But, about halfway through the program, when Joseph forgot to turn his mic on, Cecily, who had just finished her live report, jokingly whispered to her colleague, on-air: “moron.”

Your Tweets came quickly:

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Drink 10.

Joseph quickly covered up on Twitter:

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So did Gardner, with this tongue-in-cheek on-air clarification:

“There comes a point where we have to sort of figure out how closely we respond to what you folks have to say on social media. On Twitter, for instance. And maybe I shouldn’t even acknowledge this, but I think it’s important that the folks who thought that Cecily called Adam an untoward name when Adam was having trouble with his microphone… that’s not at all true. I really should’t even say this… it begins with an “M” and it ends with an “N” and there’s an “O” and an “R” and an “O” in there somewhere. What Cecily was saying was, “Do you want mine on, my microphone?” And then Adam had the chance to fix his mic before that even became an issue. So, that Cecily called Adam an untoward name, that’s not the case at all. We don’t do that here, we are a family. We love each other. [To Tynan and Joseph] YOU’RE ACTING LIKE A MORON!”

 

Tynan had a slightly different version of things:

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You can judge for yourself in the video after the jump.

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