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Ten Reasons Why College Football is Better Than the NFL

Kevin Kinkead - August 21, 2019

Photo Credit: Matthew O'Haren-USA TODAY Sports

Can you smell it? It’s the aroma of tailgate food wafting into my nostrils, overpowering the funky odor that generally hangs over the River Wards.

Autumn is just around the corner, and that means you can strap me down and inject college football directly into my veins. I want to overdose on it. I want to wake up in a daze, turn to my television, and slowly focus in on the score in the upper left corner:

West Virginia 55, Virginia Tech 0.

Give it to me. Give me Manny Diaz going 0-12 and getting himself fired. Give me Penn State vs. Pittsburgh and Temple vs. Maryland and Villanova vs. Delaware. I want it all, and I want it now, as Freddie Mercury used to say.

Here are 10 reasons why college football is better than the NFL. Don’t even think about disagreeing with me.

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ESPN’s New College Football Anthem is a Bazillion Times Better Than Imagine Dragons

Kevin Kinkead - August 9, 2019

Photo Credit: Stephen R. Sylvanie-USA TODAY Sports

Ah, thank God. Thank God we don’t have to hear Imagine Dragons a million times on ESPN this season.

“You’re a natural, blah blah blah blah, a beating heart of stone, blah blah blah you’re a natural.”

Terrible song.

This season ESPN is rolling with an anthem by Judah & the Lion, a track called “Let Go,” which will be seared into your skull permanently by mid-September.

Here’s what they wrote about it in a press release:

“College football is back. For fans, teams and players, it is about letting it all go for the wild ride of the season,” said Emeka Ofodile, ESPN vice president of marketing. “Judah & the Lion and their single ‘Let Go’ captures that emotion and story to a ‘T’. We can’t wait for college football to start.”

Said Brian Nolan, Senior Vice President, Capitol Music Group, “We are thrilled to partner with ESPN for the upcoming college football season.  Music plays such a prominent role within the landscape of the college football experience and Judah & the Lion have delivered an instant classic anthem with ‘Let Go.’”

Yeah whatever.

Here’s the song, after the jump:

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Halftime Show: Imagine Dragons Were Really Bad and Lil’ Wayne Looked Like the Hamburglar

Kevin Kinkead - January 8, 2019

the most ambitious crossover event in history

Last night I issued a challenge to my Twitter followers.

I asked them to rank the following bands from best to worst:

  • Imagine Dragons
  • Nickelback
  • Creed
  • Puddle of Mudd
  • Chumbawamba

Most peopled placed Creed first, I guess because of Mark Tremonti’s guitar playing. Chumbawamba came in second place on average because of their anarchist and punkish/indie past. In hindsight, I could have come up with a worse band. Maybe Hoobastank or Crazy Town.

This exercise in relative futility was inspired by the treat of a halftime performance we received last night from Imagine Dragons and Lil’ Wayne, a performance only slightly less impressive than what Alabama mustered in Santa Clara in a 44-16 loss to Clemson. It was a good night for Joe Giglio and his Tua Tagovailoa take:

Some random thoughts on the halftime train wreck:

  1. I will give Imagine Dragons a lot of credit for not lip-syncing, but the lead singer, Dan Reynolds, had trouble staying on key
  2. Reynolds was wearing some kind of terrible capri pants
  3. the chorus for the “Thunder” song just repeats this over and over: Thunder, feel the thunder, Lightning and the thunder, Thunder, feel the thunder, Lightning and the thunder, Thunder, thunder
  4. Lil’ Wayne was unlistenable
  5. Wayne was wearing some sort of knee-high Ugg-looking boots to go along with an overcoat that looked like a combination of a sherpa blanket, tribal shaman garb, and a Hamburglar top hat
  6. the performance didn’t even take place inside the stadium
  7. the crowd didn’t seem to be super excited
  8. there were barely any shots of the other guys in Imagine Dragons, just Reynolds, who was stage front while the guitar player and bass player were stuck in the back with the drummer, like session musicians

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In Case You Couldn’t Get Enough of ESPN’s Monday Night Football Crew

Kevin Kinkead - January 3, 2019

via ESPN

They’re back for more.

ESPN is giving the people what they want, which is another go-round with the mostly-maligned but nascent crew that just wrapped up their first NFL season together:

Two thoughts, after the jump:

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Rutgers Tries ‘Philly Special’ Against Penn State, It Does Not End Well

Bob Wankel - November 17, 2018

VIA TWITTER

Penn State and Rutgers are playing something that resembles a collegiate football game this afternoon in New Jersey. Of course, that’s not particularly noteworthy, unless boring football between one underachieving team and one absolutely brutal team does it for you.

But I am here to show you this “highlight” which took place with Rutgers trailing 13-0 in the third quarter facing a fourth and goal from the Penn State two-yard line:

THE PHILLY SPECIAL! Great play call, great execution, and…the quarterback dropped it.

Now carry on with your Saturday.

Fart Noises

Kevin Kinkead - October 29, 2018

via Twitter

If you watch college football, you know Mike Gundy as Oklahoma State’s longtime head coach.

If you don’t watch college football, you know Mike Gundy as the guy who once yelled, “I’m a man! I’m 40!”

He was at it again this weekend with another solid rant, this time in response to a question about outside criticism of his senior quarterback, Taylor Cornelius:

The verbatim is good for a laugh, after the jump:

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The First Coaches Poll is Out

Kevin Kinkead - August 3, 2018

Photo Credit: Dale Zanine-USA TODAY Sports

College ball is right around the corner.

I’m pumped. Saturdays are all about Premier League in the morning, then NCAA football for the next 12 hours, which gets really weird when Hawaii vs. San Jose State ends at 1:30 a.m. Then you wake up and realize it’s an NFL Sunday. Man, life is so easy.

Anyway, the first coaches poll came out this week and it’s the usual suspects at the top. Your Penn State Nittany Lions slide in at #9 overall (first place votes in parentheses):

  1. Alabama (61)
  2. Clemson (3)
  3. Ohio State (1)
  4. Georgia
  5. Oklahoma
  6. Washington
  7. Wisconsin
  8. Miami
  9. Penn State
  10. Auburn
  11. Notre Dame
  12. Michigan State
  13. Stanford
  14. Michigan
  15. Southern Cal
  16. TCU
  17. disgusting team from Blacksburg, Virginia
  18. Mississippi State
  19. Florida State
  20. West by God Virginia
  21. Texas
  22. Boise State
  23. Central Florida
  24. LSU
  25. Oklahoma State

Looks pretty straightforward to me. The Big 10 is well represented in the top 15. Washington is the preseason PAC 12 favorite and Oklahoma is the only Big 12 team to crack the top ten. I don’t know how Penn State replaces Saquon Barkley and a couple of important receivers, but you do have Trace McSorley coming back behind an experienced offensive line.

Here are the other teams receiving votes:

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Larry Fedora Said Some Unpopular Stuff

Kevin Kinkead - July 19, 2018

Photo Credit: Jeremy Brevard-USA TODAY Sports

Larry Fedora, who wears a visor, gave a weird press conference at the Atlantic Coast Conference’s football media day.

The North Carolina head ball coach was asked about a variety of topics and spun off on a stream-of-consciousness discussion about the state of the game in the United States.

From Raleigh’s ABC11:

Fedora also spoke specifically about how rule changes in college football are changing the game, and not for the better. As football goes, Fedora said, so goes our country.

“Our game is under attack,” Fedora said. “I fear that the game will be pushed so far from what we know that we won’t recognize it 10 years from now. And if it does, our country will go down, too.”

…

Fedora also relayed the following anecdote: He spoke with a general – military branch unknown – and asked what made America’s forces the strongest in the world. It’s because the U.S. is the only country that plays football, the general replied, per Fedora.

“I think because of the lessons you learn in the game of football relate to everything you’re going to do for the rest of your life,” Fedora said. “When we stop learning those lessons, we’re going to struggle.

Okay, well, I agree that football teaches life lessons, but it’s certainly not the only source of wisdom and knowledge. You could probably learn the same lessons from basketball or baseball or marching band or debate club. And I don’t know if our military is the strongest in the world because we play football, it could also be that we spend 600 billion dollars on it.

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